A member of my favorite Internet forum brought up the difference between my misremembering the quote I used in the blog title and the real one. I remembered a message about being too educated and never living...tuning an instrument but never playing it. The other is so much better and illustrates a great deal about my view of Special Education. Often true of public education but especially for those with mental illness specifically. There are all kinds of disabilities: learning disabilities, physical limitations such as mobility, deafness and blindness and mental retardation...in a resource room in SPED (special education) they are grouped in ability levels, mild-moderate and severe-profound, not to disability. I doubt a student severely/profoundly affected by mental illness would be put with the those severe/profoundly affected by mental retardation as one of either may go to a specialized school if there is one nearby.
If you are not in special education for anything but mental illness this stigmatized position in society may have you in a place where you are the only one with just emotional problems causing your low grades. That wouldn't be bad if they had and followed appropriate Individualized Educational Programs (IEP) but all the classrooms I saw, and there were very few with just a mental illness that I knew of save the alternative school I went to (they went to alt. school as a second chance after they failed out of high school), but the resource room I saw had students doing very remedial work even if they were bright. One student was bright and in a lower level resource room due to his behavior, according to the teacher. What does one do? He did tolerably in the easier class because he could goof off more but the work was profoundly below his level. I believe it was below the level of every student in the class. When the work was more challenging he caused trouble so he went back to the easier room. I know teachers are overworked and behavior is difficult but there was no available way to help him control his behavior and challenge himself academically. This may be the biggest dilemma I see in SPED...kid is bright but behavior is terrible...I have seen the bright ignored to address the behavior. That is easy and maintains the status quo...harder is to challenge the student to motivate him or herself while teaching to manage behavior.
The quote I wanted to use as the premise for my blog was one I heard once a very long time ago and as I stated did not remember correctly. I thought it was “I have spent my live tuning my instrument and I have not yet begun the song I was sent to the earth to play.” It is really “I have spent my days stringing and unstringing my instrument while the song I came to sing remains unsung.” Rabindranath Tagore said it. It is unfortunate that I got it wrong because I am unable to change the title of the blog to “Let them sing.” It may be the title to a great deal of blogs anyway even though I prefer the way it sounds. I also prefer the real quote strongly. The mistake does have a far- fetched reference to the use of accommodations by special education students. It is possible their disability does not allow them to “sing” in ways that are understandable. Their education should give them “instruments” they can express themselves with. However if they are lucky enough to learn to “string and unstring their instruments” they are certainly not allowed to play them, or are discouraged from trying to play them well.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
What did you want to be when you were growing up? For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a teacher, and somehow I always wanted to teach the grade I was currently attending. That one always seemed the best. However in high school I got what I thought was a dose of reality. Teacher positions are superbly difficult to come by even if you have a doctorate which my underpaid high school freshman (same as sophomore) English teacher had. With that in mind I wimped out and got a BA in psychology. That was not entirely a mistake because not only do I love studying the subject but I now know I want to teach high school students who have mental health issues. Sometimes I really dislike the word "issue" but one can't always avoid using the lingo or it gets tricky and verbose. "She has *issues* regarding her *coping skills*" Ugh, straight out of the paperwork I need to fill out as a mental health worker.
I digress. My focus and goal here is to share what I know about what happens--and what doesn't happen in the education of students with mental illness and I believe I will focus mainly on high school because I believe they get the worst deal. I will also examine colleges, universities, trade schools and other ways of preparing for work. I will focus on my experience as a student of education and psychology but I will also do research so that I maintain some semblance of validity here. I would like to make people think and act, in that order.
Comments Hmmm...31 views so far and no comments...this must be awfully boring...if you are seeing this, what do you think? I love council and I am not sensitive about my work. I just want this to be as good as I can make it...perhaps this is not a high interest subject? It is to me...how can I proliferate this so people will read and give helpful feedback?
Thank you,
Deborah
March 9, 2009 10:54 PM 
marius hsaid...
hey! I liked reading your posts so far. it'd be hard for me to comment specifically, though, as I suppose there's a different way of dealing with all this here in Norway, and I don't know much about that, even. I did work for a while with a spec.ped unit, though, at a high school. But that was kids with downs syndrome etc, and so it was really all about getting them to sing some kind of song, to use your metaphor
March 12, 2009 9:07 AM Deborahsaid...
This post has been removed by the author. March 12, 2009 10:18 AM Deborahsaid...
I removed that post due to a typo. I just wanted to let you know that if you wish to comment I would find a cross cultural comparison interesting. I also wanted to thank you for your comment and say I am glad you enjoyed my entries.
March 12, 2009 10:21 AM thissaid...
I had to face a comment from someone that the myth of the underperforming child is actually a rare occurrence....allbeit underperforming to the expectations of what we see as intelligence, standards and measure as such. It was one of those slapped in the face moments. So I went and looked at all the assessments for the struggling kids I had. The limitations are real in almost all situations. That doesn't mean that some situations cannot be changed or enriched...but it is not underperforming...but performing as best they can within a set of factors that are real. There is a distinction. And you know that person made me angry...what a terrible thing to say...but my perspective needed changing.
I think too, that it's all about helping them to sing the song ...
the lyrics Killing Me Softly with His Song come to mind.
"He sang as if he knew me in all my dark despair.
And then he looked right through me as if I wasn't there.
And he just kept on singing, singing clear and strong."
Yes. I feel for the glass ceiling effect for kids that are bound up by such things...it is more frustrating for them than any depth of feeling that I can every possibly have or any level of understanding I am capable of. My heart doesn't just go out to that one kid though...as the rest of the grade finds their songs that much harder to sing... how do I balance the needs of one over the needs of others and my own capacity to meet those needs without burning out.
The myth of underperforming.
Everyone is singing their song...whether it is understandable or not.... .
I once had a singing teacher that said now you need to stop mouthing the song and sing it from the heart...he was right...I was so concerned about getting it right and hitting the right notes and it wasn't a song I had chosen to sing and I didn't even know what the words meant as it was foreign...no passion. I learnt what he was trying to teach me a decade later. It took me years before I actually heard the song the way it was meant to be sung and understood what he was saying...and that I didn't go anywhere near doing what he was asking of me.
What are they asking of me....a typical teacher question...one that wakes you up in the middle of the night. A small change to the quote: I spend my days stringing and unstringing my instrument while the song I came to sing remains unstrung.
Senneca said it best: I learn in order that I may teach. Not that he was stupid, far from it...you learn from your students in order to teach them. Not my song...but a discovered song...well, hopefully..sometimes it's hard to work out what is required.
Some of my lessons are harder than others...I've seen too many IEPs that have all behaviour goals and not a single academic goal and I like to think of myself as a teacher....as overused as the phrase is.
perhaps the academic goal is to let the other children learn...and perhaps this week I am learning the hard way that... to have permission from them to teach my class is a necessary precursor to tolerance and acceptance for me teaching them at the one-to-one level otherwise learning will continue to not happen. Yes, there are more minimised behavioural problems in one-to-one situations but it is direction that is taking place even if looks like learning and teaching and it's about as helpful as putting them in an easier class or alternatively a harder class...but there is just me....and when I give individual instruction the rest of the class is without any. My current situation is quite the opposite in that the class level needs to be lowered to maintain behaviour...inclusion and all....I choose to do split level ability. This is grade is so far behind. But it makes slight difference...they are disrupted anyway. In other problem behavioural situations providing higher academic work is not accessed...but it is there...and everyone is disrupted anyway.
I guess the goal is getting permission to teach...before anyone can access permission to learn. The IEP is unwaveringly correct. So how do I challenge and motivate a student to choose freely and willingly to do so?
Any way I can...but the choice cannot be made for them.
March 18, 2009 4:38 AM smeldredsaid...
I agree with what you said...and I like that song...high school memories there.
And yes the class ceiling is not just for women but anyone not given a chance.
I think teachers often ask as we all do how to be treated, at least over time. Sure we all have our bad days and the tests that not only students but teachers as well (and I do not mean the official kind). More to come when I am more alert.
Thank you for your thoughtful post and for being my first follower.
March 20, 2009 11:08 PM smeldredsaid...
This post has been removed by the author. March 20, 2009 11:09 PM smeldredsaid...
I tried to post as myself. For some reason my posts are from my husband's account as Smeldred (P. Feldercarp) from the original Battlestar Galactica.
Tags: Specialeducaton Mentalillness
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