[DeborahC]

You cannot change other people.

But you CAN change your feelings and reactions to them.

Just consider that it could be your Ego that is the problem. You are embarrassed that he thinks and talks this way because you feel it is a reflection on you.

But it is not.
He has his own free will and is responsible for his own thoughts, feelings, and actions.

You are only responsible for yours.

So you have three choices.

You can change the situation - but you obviously cannot change him.
You can walk away - which would mean divorcing him, and I don't think you want that.
You can change yourself, and accept him - and pray for him - and pray for your own strength to accept and love him.

Do you doubt that God can work miracles?
Many Bishops came from such a place as your husband sits, I've read.