The most important work you will ever do is in the walls of your own home.
Since both of you are newer members you are growing at different rates. It might help if you lighten up a bit and give him a little room. Yeah the stuff you explained he does would be terribly hard to live with but...... people don't change over night. You are supposed to be his best friend. Maybe if you look at it in that frame, instead of your husband you might be a little less judgmental and with a more loving spirit.
I have had friends with similar situations and I know they were counseled to just be a good example. Instead of getting angry, let it go through one ear, out the other. Instead of praying he would soften his heart, pray for an understanding and loving heart. Pray for patience and inspiration and guidance how best to handle this.
Another thing that has been stressed repeatedly by the General Authorities is for couples to pray each night before bed together. Let him hear you lovingly pray for him as well as for all the others you pray for. Listen to his prayers. You may find answers in how to help him this way.
you didn't say anything about kids. That would be REALLY HARD !!!!! Good LUCK !
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