This is a tough one.... may I tell you my experience as 'the wife'. My husband has been in a band for many yrs and you can imagine the attention he is constantly getting. He would tell me some things that had taken place so I would hear it from him and not someone else...... it was hard and hurt everytime.
I had told him a few times that if I caught him cheating on me in anyway, I would leave as I didn't see the point in fighting for something he forgot about for a 'moment'. Well,... it's one thing to say it, another to act upon it.
A few yrs ago I stumbled upon evidence that blew my world to pieces, and you know what?.... I never left. But the deceit was the killer.
My advice to you is that you go see your bishop, then tell your wife. But pray for the Spirit to guide you and soften her heart.... after that there is not much else you can do. But if she had to find out by accident..... the deceit will make trusting you that much more difficult.
Good luck
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