this just seemed to fit here..... lol taken from....
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PART THREE - ALLEY OOPS - A PERK OF NOTORIETY
And now for something completely different. A small encounter while out walking yesterday thinking about writing this journal.
Early morning, not long after daybreak.
I’m about twenty blocks from home in a residential neighborhood on the other side of Queen Anne Hill from where I live. Carrying a full load of coffee, I forgot to take a prophylactic pee before I left my house, and now the pressure is building. I will never make it home in time.
Optimistically I hustle down to a Porta-Potty in front of a construction site. Locked. A small park a block away looks promising, but it’s full of the morning dump-the-dog people. It’s socially acceptable for dogs to do their awkward business in public, but old guys whizzing behind a tree is not.
Now I’m getting desperate.
At the first alley I come to I urgently scope out some possibility - maybe between garbage cans - maybe behind an open garage door - maybe wedged in behind a telephone pole. No, no, and no. All too public.
Finally, further up the alley, it’s ohmygod time and I carefully squeeze into some blackberry bushes and empty my bladder up against a fence in a stream a small horse would be proud of. I laugh and sigh in relief.
“All better?” a sweet voice asks.
Stunned, I look up to the back of the house to which the fence belongs.
A young woman is sitting in a porch swing nursing her baby.
She giggles. “It’s alright,” she says. “I understand.”
“It’s like nursing,” she says, gesturing down at her exposed breast.
“It’s a very human thing to do.”
“Thanks,” I say, with a nervous laugh.
“Actually,” she says, I know who you are. You’re that kindergarten guy, right? I’ve read your book. But I won’t tell anybody that you peed on my fence. In an odd way, I’m honored.”