IF you do this, which I am strongly, strongly suggesting you not do (at least set it so it only flags or filters certain thing, I am so very vehemently against logging "everything"), that you discuss it with your kids PRIOR to setting it - not just with your ex-wife. Then tell them why, and tell them about the dangers of the Internet. DON'T betray your children's trust, please! I beg this of you for both their sake and yours!
Teach your children, show and share with your children. Trust in them and the relationship you have between you. Do not invade their privacy, they WILL resent you for it, and you will have broken their trust in you. After you've broken their trust, it will be so hard for you to gain it back, and then from that point, any teaching you give will fall on deaf and rebellious ears.
If the situation arises that your children do indeed visit questionable sites, or have less-than-inspiring conversations, and you bring up your "evidence" in logs and then proceed to confront them, what do you think will happen?
It is so much better (in terms of personal trust and its betrayal, but still setting boundaries) to set up filters and blockers on the front end, that prevents the searching and loading of "bad" websites. It is up-front and not secretive, known to them to be for their own protection (even if they think you're being too strict), and it stops them beforehand, rather than you finding out about it after the fact.
Trust me, a kid remembers, and it's difficult to recover from a sense betrayal, and the idea that a parent failed you personally - I am attesting to this personally from my own experience. My relationship with my mom is "civil", but if someone asked me if I loved her, I honestly don't know what might be the answer. And I'm not alienated from my mother, I live at home. And it's not as though I want to have a difficult relationship with her, I just can't get past how she still is, the things and way she thinks, even if her intentions are "good".
Your kids already come from a "broken home", please don't set up the situation where they may lose their trust in their father! This is so much more than calling your children back into the house to put on a helmet, there is no issue of trust there.
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