Thread: Spanking
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Old 03-03-2006, 07:45 AM
shanstress70 shanstress70 is offline
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That's a bit over-confident, imho. It's true that we don't have to use the spank. However, the so-called quick fix, time-saver, is often a relief for children, as well as parents. The escalation of behavior ends, the constant negotiation/renegotiation, 5-min, 10-min, 30-min time-outs, the lengthy explanations--sometimes a quick 10-second, one or two-"tap-spank" stops the whole cycle. Child becomes quiet, and within two minutes, is playing nicely, or compliantly helping with clean up.
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I think all the explanations are worth it for the child to 'get it'. And yes, the child becomes quiet, all while learning that in order to solve things, violence is in order.

And you don't have to negotiate/renegotiate... simple decide on a method of discipline and stick to it. My son know that certain actions means he will get a time-out. He does not like time-out, so most of the time I can give him one warning and it works. However, if it does not work and he does it again, he goes in his room while I set the timer for 3 minutes. He's very unhappy while he's in there. When the timer goes off, I go to his room, explain to him once again why he got the time-out, make him apologize, give him a hug and tell him I love him. We go about our business like nothing ever happened. It's usually a long time before he does the same action that got him there.

I do believe in consequences and discipline, but not in hitting your child, no matter how lightly. However, I do not judge those who do spank. You are doing what you think is best, just like I am. All we can do is try.
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