My advice as a wife.....ABSOUTELY TELL HER!!!!!! From experience the things you try to hide come out eventually whether it takes months or years and normally in a horrible way that will hurt your relationship way worse than you coming clean will. You said you have already been hiding this for years...think about how much relief you will feel when you get it off your chest. Will she be mad? Of course and very understandably so. She will most likely yell, scream, threaten to leave, all of it and you will need to take it. Don't let her feel that she was to blame in any way. Just let her know it was a mistake and you want to save your marriage.
And definitely tell your bishop as well.
Best of luck to you.
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