I Want To Set My Ward On Fire!!!!

BetterthanBunnies · #1 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 02:19 PM

I think I've had it. I go to a singles ward in the Salt Lake valley, not a student ward, it mostly has older people who are into their careers and things. Well you wouldn't think it was this way with people in their mid-late twenties, but about 95% of the ward are flakes. Complete and total flakes. Tell me if anyone "gets" this.

--I make a visiting teaching appointment, and both my companion and the visiting teachee flake out--they have other things to do.
--For the past 5 months I've done visiting teaching alone and haven't even gotten to know my new comp, because she won't answer her phone or email. I can't find her apartment, because she gave the ward the wrong address.

--When it's time to clean the church building, you can always count on the SFP...the same five people. I've gotten really good at washing windows. C'mon, people, 10:00 is not that early!
--RS Enrichment only about 5-10 people come. Last Enrichment not even the RS president came.
--The Activities committee has not had their monthly activity for the past 4 months. They announce it...and then cancel it due to lack of planning. Nice.
--The Fellowshipping chair calls and reminds people, including her own committee, to bring food they signed up for for the munch and mingle, and--suprise!--they don't. They do expect to still eat the food, though. Nice, huh? The last time this happened the munch and mingle turned out to be a disaster, and the bishopbric gave the fellowshipping chair a talking-to. She hasn't come to church since. Surprise.
--The committee I helm (FHE) and my co-chair are often given extra assignments in the ward, such as passing out flyers, ward reps for the region, taking over for the Activities committee, and hurry-quick please do this to cover for the deadbeats, because we're the few people in the ward who actually follow through on stuff.
--I, and most of the other people in the ward, haven't been home-taught for over a year. I don't even recognize the names of my home teachers though I am pretty familiar with most people in the ward. Nice, huh?

All right, enough whining. That was a lot of whining. Sorry. But you get the point. My ward is DEADBEAT! I keep thinking if I have a positive attitude and just work at being the best ward leader there is, work hard and plan hard, then at least I won't get my eyeballs sucked out at the second coming. But yesterday was the last straw. I passed around a sign-up sheet for an activity a week away, asking people for their email addresses if they were willing to share an anscestor story. I emphasized that it was important everyone participated because the success of the activity depended on them, and we were really looking forward to hearing everyone's cool stories.

A total of 3 people signed up. The munch and mingle sign-up sheet (passed around by the RS pres, since the fellowshipping chair has quit the ward) was more of a success. They got 5 whole signatures. There were about 30 people in the RS room. You'd think that these same people who bore their testimony in tears every Fast Sunday had a strong enough testimony to bring a crummy bag of cookies to a stupid munch and mingle!!!!

Well that's my vent. So here's my question: I want to move out of the ward, really, really bad and go to a family ward. For most of my single-adult life I have gone to a family ward and have loved it. BUT would I be as flakey as the people in my current ward if I left because my ward was flakey? I'm not a fan of quitting, but I honestly don't know if I can take this ward anymore. I once told the bishop I was moving out and he looked like he was going to cry. I'm not sure what to do.

FunkyTown · #2 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 02:25 PM

You are facing one of the most difficult part of being part of the church - The people around you are not living up to the expectations you expected them to(The other being that a person is not living up to their own expectations).

Short answer: You aren't flaking out. You're going where you're most comfortable in the church.

Long answer: You should share your concerns with the bishopric. Be open and honest, though that's a frightening concept. Don't be abrasive, but have answers ready for why you feel the way you do. Be understanding as to why this is, but point out that you feel lost in this ward. Ask what you can do to improve things.

If you can't, it's okay to go.

unixknight · #3 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 02:26 PM

It sounds like some serious prayer is needed at the Stake level. The Stake President should be made aware of what's going on if he doesn't know already.

utcowboy · #4 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 02:28 PM

The only thing you can do is follow your heart, but I gotta tell ya that its really the same in the family wards, only there is usually 10 people to wash the windows. I've been active in my ward for almost 2 yrs and its the same there. Most of the people are great one on one but they don't know how to volunteer for anything, its worse than pulling teeth. Every ward or branch, stake and area have the same types of wards and members, there are those that look forward to their callings and there are those that dread their callings. I hope you find the happiness that you are looking for and I wonder if you are not in this ward for a reason?!?!?

MarginOfError · #5 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 02:33 PM

I think Single's Wards are a waste of time. Hit up the traditional ward and make sure you're active in Institute. Just my opinion.

FunkyTown · #6 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarginOfError

I think Single's Wards are a waste of time. Hit up the traditional ward and make sure you're active in Institute. Just my opinion.

I love singles wards! I made so many good friends in singles wards.

utcowboy · #7 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 02:47 PM

We each have to do our parts and remember that we are not there just for us. We are there for each other, to help lift, strengthen and guide one another is the gospel of Jesus Christ.

MorningStar · #8 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 03:02 PM

Well, I think moving is a better option than setting your whole ward on fire. More practical too. And less illegal. :P

utcowboy · #9 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 03:22 PM

Where is that LOL button that was discussed in the other thread..... I like it Morning.... but it might not hurt to lite a fire under some of them..... and it might make her feel a whole lot better... I know it would make me feel better sometimes.... But I guess thats why the doc says I should stay on medication.

connerific · #10 (**permalink**) 07-21-2008, 03:47 PM

This is a classic case of wheat and tares. Remember the story of the 10 virgins. Only half of membership of the church will be ready for the Savior's return. The only thing you can do is make sure you are ready for it.

Personally, i never liked singles wards, but i know a lot of people, some family included, who got great fulfillment from singles wards. Due to your level of frustration, i would probably encourage you to move to a family ward. Making it matter of prayer would certainly not hurt. I said the same thing to a young man i know, except i was encouraging him to go to a singles ward as his situation was the opposite.