"It'll be okay." Fine. When?

[Iggy]

Originally Posted by Misshalfway

God is working out something bigger or perhaps more broad for us.

Miss, I think it is God is giving us this opportunity to refine ourselves, of letting US work out the something bigger in the process of refining ourselves.

[Dove]

Originally Posted by VisionOfLehi

I've heard this so many times in the past several years.

Every time I go through a difficult time... People tell me:

"It'll be okay."
"It'll all work out."
"This'll go away."

Well, when?


God won't give me more than I can endure, but He's cutting it close.

I'm sorry, it seems you are going through a difficult time right now.
I have often questioned the scripture that says "God won't give us more than we can endure," especially when I think of the Jewish children that went insane from living through the holocaust.
I believe that Father will not hold us accountable for more than we are able to handle/cope with, not necessarily that we won't be presented with more than we are able to handle, especially if it is because of the unrighteous decisions of others. I just read in the Book of Mormon today that He allows the righteous to die in allowing the wicked their agency. I hope this isn't depressing for you.
One thing that helps me is to let go, let go of whatever it is that is causing me to "lose it." I have thought on more than one occasion that even if I end up homeless, just breathing through the day means that I'm making it through.
In one aspect of my life, G-d has kept me from making a terrible mistake. I have fought with suicidal tendencies for years. There was a time when I was planning it and getting ready to go down to the store to buy the materials needed to carry it out. Every time He has been there for me, working with me and giving me the spiritual strength to not carry it out. He has literally kept me from doing this. Sadly, this was not true for a friend of mine who did committ suicide a few years back. I wonder what the difference was between her and I. I don't know....and it hurts. She is loved and missed by a community of people. Maybe our circumstances were different, perhaps it was her time to go, or she was allowed the fulfilling of this desire. I don't know.
As I was writing this, a comforting feeling came over me. It's all okay in this moment means to me that God is aware of each one of us, and He has all of our best interests at heart. His intent is to give us our hearts true and deepest desires, whatever those may be.
Hope this helps
Dove

[Listener]

I don't think I have any magic words, VoL, the ease the pain.

I do think that StrawberryFields had the right idea. Hugs all around. Rather that minimising how difficult life can be, or repeating scriptural mantras in search of peace, sometimes a healthy dose of love, compassion, and commiseration can do wonders. (Chocolate optional.)

I, for one, find you to be gentle and helpful, and willing to learn. These qualities are valuable where you are now, and for the rest of your life. I rejoice in who you are...and weep for both of us for the struggle.

[Canuck Mormon]

I thought the same thing when I was going through my divorce and bankruptcy. People were saying the same things. I thought "How on earth would you know??" 5 years later, things are better. I don't remember the exact moment things got better, it was a gradual process.

Good luck VoL. Not to sound like a cliché, but, Things will get better.

[WANDERER]

Sometimes things get better in that: you learn to live with them (more or less: you only have so much stress to give to any problem) and you get better coping skills for managing things. People can and do cope with things, unbelievable things (ugh, that doesn't help though). In the end: the amount of time you spend on worry and feeling bad doesn't go one iota towards fixing situations. You can come up with a plan or way of handling things..which will work or won't work and that's about it. It usually amounts to endure and hope for better. We just leave the endure bit out and focus on telling people it will be okay one day. You don't want to hear the endure bit do you ? LOL.

Actually I've found that it's better when people give me destressing skills: there's nothing better than time out with friends or a fun-filled day or vacation for putting the emphasis back on the things that you aren't giving time when problems fill it. Sometimes you need a little bit of help..sometimes you have to be literally forced to do fun things...do them whether you feel like it or not. They will be fun again...if not now, then over time. Never stop doing the things that you love...even when flatlining on energy. Things can slide a little downwards: Where focus goes energy flows.

Chocolate is good too.

Stay in there. I'm also a fan of the king and ring story; he asked his counsellors to give him a gift that would make him sad when he was happy and happy when he was sad:so they gave him a ring inscribed with "this too shall pass". Our collection of the bitter and sweet just increases as time goes by and the decades add on...no point in being bland ; )

[DigitalShadow]

I find that it's all too easy to ignore all of the good things you have going and focus only on the bad things. Be grateful for what you have, expand your perspective, and it is probably not nearly as bad as you think.

[VisionOfLehi]

Originally Posted by DigitalShadow

I find that it's all too easy to ignore all of the good things you have going and focus only on the bad things. Be grateful for what you have, expand your perspective, and it is probably not nearly as bad as you think.

Ah, the problem with all those good things is that I don't deserve them and I feel like crap for having them

[utcowboy]

VoL, you have many friends, some that you have never met and all of us want only the best for you. We wish at any one moment that we can help you in your trials, but some times something have to be done with just the rest of us watching. I wish you the best and hope that everything works out the way you need it to.

[OneEternalSonata]

I think sometimes people will say some of those cookie-cutter answers when they don't know how to help but genuinely want to. Anyhow, I hope you find the eternal answers tucked into your experience. Take care.

[candyprpl]

C.S. Lewis -- ...He [Heavenly Father] warned people to 'count the cost', before becoming christians. 'Make no mistake,' He says, if you let me, I will make you perfect. The moment you put yourself in My hands, that is what you are in for. Nothing less than that. You have free will, and if you choose, you can push Me away. But if you do not push Me away, understand that I am going to see this job through. Whatever suffering it may cost you in your earthly life, whatever inconcievable purification it may cost you after death, whatever it costs Me [the Atonement] I will until my Father can say without reservation that He is well pleased with you, as He said He was well pleased with me. This I can do and will do. I will not do anything less. Of course we never wanted, and never asked, to be made into the sort of creatures He is going to make us into. But the question is not what we intended ourselves to be, but what He intended us to be when he made us. The job will not be completed in this life; but He means to get us as far as possible before death. That is why we must not be surprised if we are in for a rough time. ...because God is forcing him [us] on, or up, to a higher level: putting him into situations where he will have to be very much braver, or more patient, or more loving, than he ever dreamed of being before. It seems to us all so unnecessary; but that is because we have not yet had the slightest notion of the tremendous thing He means to make of us. 'Be ye perfect,' is not a command to do the impossible. He is going to make us into creatures that can obey that command. He said that we are 'gods' and He is going to make good His words. If we let Him -- for we can prevent Him, if we choose. If we let Him, He will make the feeblest and filtiest of us into a god or goddess, a dazzling radiant immortal creature, pulsating all through with such energy and joy and wisdom and love as we cannot now imagine, a bright stainless mirror which reflects back to God perfectly (though of course, on a smaller scale) His own boundless power and delight and goodness. The process will be long and in parts very painful, but that is what we are in for. Nothing less. He meant what He said.