Sinned but not Repentant - Page 2

Wingnut · #11 (**permalink**) 10-01-2008, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by abqfriend

I am a Catholic, but the standards we have on the issue are the same or similar to LDS view. In my faith tradition, we do not call the Bishop, but we do something similar and that is talk to a priest. This is called the Sacrament of Reconciliation and was once called The Sacrament of Confession.

Is it really called the Sacrament of Reconciliation now? I think that's very interesting. I have a historical note in my scriptures about that word:

"Atonement," a made-up old English word, was taken from a Greek word for "reconciliation." To break down reconciliation, it means "to be united with," "to be seated with," or "to come back to a relationship after a period of separation."

Just wanted to share.

MorningStar · #12 (**permalink**) 10-01-2008, 06:35 PM

I agree that you should talk to him anyway. The more you put it off, the more likely you are to repeat it. And it might seem like a victimless sin, but you guys have hurt yourselves and each other in ways you don't realize. Don't fall into the trap of, "Well we already screwed up - might as well keep doing it." You're "planning" on marrying her? Are you engaged? You might want to speed up the process.

bmy- · #13 (**permalink**) 10-02-2008, 12:32 AM

Pray about it. I also. . struggle with repenting.

Generally speaking -- I say i'm sorry [to God] -- but I do NOT make promises I don't intend to keep. That being said.. this goes for every sin. You can't 'choose' to repent. It just happens. At least in my experience.

Try this: Abstain from sex for the next month or two [and live the Gospel to the letter]. True repentance might come easier. I can't say it will or won't.. but it's always worth a shot.

FunkyTown · #14 (**permalink**) 10-02-2008, 04:01 AM

Yep. They're right. What you're doing right now is justifying 'cause no immediate bad things are coming.

That having been said, I think the previous poster was right: Try abstaining from sex for several months and see how that affects things. I bet that you'll see how it harms you.

DanielNicolai · #15 (**permalink**) 10-02-2008, 05:13 AM

I want to say I was abstaining from sex for the past 11 months, but that was my time when I was in my divorce until I was single (about 4 months ago) and didn't really have a girlfriend. Heck I didn't even want one. We waited about 20 dates until it happened. I set up an appointment to see my Bishop on Tuesday (would have been over the weekend, but the timing was bad with General Conference) and we're going to be focusing on not doing what we have been doing.

She's chickening out a bit though, she just started going back to church about a month ago at my insistence and had just been in with the bishop two weeks ago because she was inactive because of the embarrassment. But with both of us going forward with this I think it will all be okay. I will try my best to do what my Bishop says, but as bmy- said, I don't make any promises.

In more interesting news, I put her ring down on layaway, it's the one she wanted and I totally have the proposal all planned out, I would post it here, but she reads the site now that I showed it to her, so no details on that

lilered · #16 (**permalink**) 10-02-2008, 08:04 AM

I agree with those who encourage you to talk with your Bishop and get this behind you. I also agree that originally the spirit may not have been with you as strong as possible and therefore may be the reason you are not feeling repentant. However, you do seem to recognize that what you did was wrong. So, why not put your house in order now and then set your path right at the start of your marriage with the Lords Blessings?

Hemidakota · #17 (**permalink**) 10-02-2008, 09:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanielNicolai

Alright, I feel kind of weird about this. My girlfriend and I, whom I plan on marrying, had sex twice now, the first time over the weekend and the second last night. I know that what we did was wrong in the eyes of the Lord, but I was raised with different values than that of the church.

Anyway, I guess my big question is if I should go to the Bishop with my girlfriend and tell him what is going on while I am not repentant or if I should wait until a later date. I feel that I should go to see him as soon as possible, but I'm not really sure why. I can still feel the spirit and am still given my own personal revelation, and that is what is really strange to me, I keep reading that the Holy Ghost will not be with us when we have sinned and need to repent. I think that is one of the factors in my not feeling the need to.

Now for the worst thing about it all, I think that if I don't feel repentant I may seem arrogant to my Bishop, and I really like him (I'm planning on having him officiate the wedding when that comes around). I just feel that if I am not repentant that I should not go to the Bishop. He may need to know what is going on, but I am not sure what all I should do. Any advice?

Ensure she is with you on this confession. Be sincere...be remorseful...be humble enough to accept what will be dwelt out for both of you. Remember, the greater sin, is the sin of not repenting when we have the opportunity to do so.

Now, may the Lord give you both, courage to do the right. May He also give you the ability to see the wrong. May He give you both, the ability to see your bright future after repenting.

Good luck....

ceeboo · #18 (**permalink**) 10-02-2008, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hemidakota

Ensure she is with you on this confession. Be sincere...be remorseful...be humble enough to accept what will be dwelt out for both of you. Remember, the greater sin, is the sin of not repenting when we have the opportunity to do so.

Now, may the Lord give you both, courage to do the right. May He also give you the ability to see the wrong. May He give you both, the ability to see your bright future after repenting.

Good luck....

A Catholic ditto

God bless and " congrats " on the ring thing

RachelleDrew · #19 (**permalink**) 10-03-2008, 04:53 PM

My husband struggled with the same thoughts as you. We had sex long before we were married, and it's hard to feel guilty when you have a beautiful son as a result of those pre-marital relations and a good relationship with your spouse despite those pre-marital relations.

My husband spoke with our bishop, and was frank with him about his lack of remorse. Our bishop understood the feelings completely, and told him that even though everything seemed to work out in the end, Christ still suffered for our sin of pre-marital sex. Maybe it didn't seem like the deed harmed anyone, but Christ still died on the cross so that our sins wouldn't consume us entirely.

I thought that was a really good way of putting it.

georgia2 · #20 (**permalink**) 10-03-2008, 09:48 PM

Maybe you don't feel remorse because you love this woman and you are planning on getting married. The wonderful feelings between a man and a woman are one of our greatest gifts from HEavenly Father. He made us to feel this way, He wants us to feel this way. BUT. after we are married.

It is hard to feel bad about something that is so good. If you want the blessings promised to those who keep the commandments, continue to have respect for your sweetheart and she for you, you need to do it the Lords way. He knows what brings us happiness and joy and ultimately that is why he gives us these commandments in the first place.