Need Help w/ My Family & Problems

taisama · #1 (**permalink**) 10-13-2008, 08:45 PM

I am a 16 year old boy and a member of the church. I go to church every Sunday, even though it doesn't really mean much to me. I mostly go because my friends are there. I rarely get anything out of my meetings, though I feel that I want to improve my life most of the time when I go, but it doesn't last very long. I have a testimony, but I am starting no to pay attention to it so much now. I have been having more and more problems with my family through the past 4 years. I view my siblings as the most annoying and agrivating things I have ever seen. I get angry if they even look at me wrong, or say anything I don't like. I have 4 AP classes, so I am busy doing my homework most of the time. My parents are worried about me because they rarely see me or talk to me. They try to make up for it by making me be part of family home evening and scripture reading and other family activities, which I hate with a passion and see them as a huge waste of time. I talked to my dad, but he has no idea what I mean and cannot understand me, though he thinks he does. I am struggling with a pornography addiction, ever since I was 12. I talked with my bishop about it, but I still don't feel worthy and it is still a huge temptation. I don't read my scriptures or pray often in private. I go to seminary, but I don't know why. i am just really confused and angry all the time. There are no problems at school and I have good friends. What can I do? I really need help.

momohans · #2 (**permalink**) 10-13-2008, 10:36 PM

Taisama,

I can definitely relate to your anger towards your family. I had similar feelings towards some of my family as a teenager as well. The reason your post caught my eye though is because I read an article today about an online product that helps people recover from pornography addiction. Here is a link to the article:

Deseret News | Net program helps porn addicts

I had to do a google search to find their web site though. It's candeocan.com. I would guess that your anger and your addiction are related to each other.

I hope you find peace in your life.

nymormon · #3 (**permalink**) 10-13-2008, 11:11 PM

I am really sorry to hear about your problems. You are a very angry young man. The fact that you posted this means that you recognize that you need help. You don't say what your bishop's response was when you talked with him. You do need someone to talk to. Have you asked either your bishop or your parents if they could refer you to a counselor?

jadams_4040 · #4 (**permalink**) 10-13-2008, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taisama

I am a 16 year old boy and a member of the church. I go to church every Sunday, even though it doesn't really mean much to me. I mostly go because my friends are there. I rarely get anything out of my meetings, though I feel that I want to improve my life most of the time when I go, but it doesn't last very long. I have a testimony, but I am starting no to pay attention to it so much now. I have been having more and more problems with my family through the past 4 years. I view my siblings as the most annoying and agrivating things I have ever seen. I get angry if they even look at me wrong, or say anything I don't like. I have 4 AP classes, so I am busy doing my homework most of the time. My parents are worried about me because they rarely see me or talk to me. They try to make up for it by making me be part of family home evening and scripture reading and other family activities, which I hate with a passion and see them as a huge waste of time. I talked to my dad, but he has no idea what I mean and cannot understand me, though he thinks he does. I am struggling with a pornography addiction, ever since I was 12. I talked with my bishop about it, but I still don't feel worthy and it is still a huge temptation. I don't read my scriptures or pray often in private. I go to seminary, but I don't know why. i am just really confused and angry all the time. There are no problems at school and I have good friends. What can I do? I really need help.

Pleae remember the most important things in this life are i;E.. number one. this church "is" true" and yu will always be much better off with it in your life. secondly; at the age of sixteen you are going thru the hardest years of your life right now. Please remember it and put two and two together.

nathan0018 · #5 (**permalink**) 10-14-2008, 06:10 AM

i can see my own self on you.... almost es share the same thing and problem.. i think the best way you can do is to pray.. pray for your own willingness to enjoy spritual things... some instances that i also thought the same ideas but i never cease to find enjoyment on the church... just hold on to the things you the best and all this things shall be added unto you... god bless

changed · #6 (**permalink**) 10-17-2008, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taisama

I don't read my scriptures or pray often in private.

There is a good place to start... try reading your scriptures and saying a few more prayers...

And try and let some love into your life! People are people, no one is perfect. Siblings, parents, they are the ones you know the best. everyone has their issues, you just aren't around most other people to know the extent of it

Try to love other people, make a conscious effort to be a nice friendly loving person, especially to your family!!!

and perhaps you should lay off the AP classes... I know a few companies who won't hire the 4.0 AP's because of the attitude that generally accompanies those types of people... just FYI

It is more important to be friendly and nice than to be an intellectual...

Hemidakota · #7 (**permalink**) 10-17-2008, 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taisama

I am a 16 year old boy and a member of the church. I go to church every Sunday, even though it doesn't really mean much to me. I mostly go because my friends are there. I rarely get anything out of my meetings, though I feel that I want to improve my life most of the time when I go, but it doesn't last very long. I have a testimony, but I am starting no to pay attention to it so much now. I have been having more and more problems with my family through the past 4 years. I view my siblings as the most annoying and agrivating things I have ever seen. I get angry if they even look at me wrong, or say anything I don't like. I have 4 AP classes, so I am busy doing my homework most of the time. My parents are worried about me because they rarely see me or talk to me. They try to make up for it by making me be part of family home evening and scripture reading and other family activities, which I hate with a passion and see them as a huge waste of time. I talked to my dad, but he has no idea what I mean and cannot understand me, though he thinks he does. I am struggling with a pornography addiction, ever since I was 12. I talked with my bishop about it, but I still don't feel worthy and it is still a huge temptation. I don't read my scriptures or pray often in private. I go to seminary, but I don't know why. i am just really confused and angry all the time. There are no problems at school and I have good friends. What can I do? I really need help.

A simple question here, what is your main desire in life?

ztodd · #8 (**permalink**) 10-18-2008, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taisama

I am a 16 year old boy and a member of the church. I go to church every Sunday, even though it doesn't really mean much to me. I mostly go because my friends are there. I rarely get anything out of my meetings, though I feel that I want to improve my life most of the time when I go, but it doesn't last very long. I have a testimony, but I am starting no to pay attention to it so much now. I have been having more and more problems with my family through the past 4 years. I view my siblings as the most annoying and agrivating things I have ever seen. I get angry if they even look at me wrong, or say anything I don't like. I have 4 AP classes, so I am busy doing my homework most of the time. My parents are worried about me because they rarely see me or talk to me. They try to make up for it by making me be part of family home evening and scripture reading and other family activities, which I hate with a passion and see them as a huge waste of time. I talked to my dad, but he has no idea what I mean and cannot understand me, though he thinks he does. I am struggling with a pornography addiction, ever since I was 12. I talked with my bishop about it, but I still don't feel worthy and it is still a huge temptation. I don't read my scriptures or pray often in private. I go to seminary, but I don't know why. i am just really confused and angry all the time. There are no problems at school and I have good friends. What can I do? I really need help.

I actually had the thought that I'm pleased with you for sticking with it even though it's tough. Many people would just give up, but you seem to be a strong person who is willing to keep trying. I commend you for that. I hope you know and can still feel that your Heavenly Father is pleased that you are still trying to do what is right.

I know you have problems- we all do. A lot of people have that same struggle with managing their anger. And you're not alone in your struggling with pornography either. You say it's still a huge temptation- believe me, I understand. But I hope you also believe me that God loves you far beyond enough to forgive you completely for that. Just keep sticking with it, and just try to do a little more each day to get those good habits going that will help you find that joy and peace that you're looking for.

I know a lot of people struggle with reading their scriptures- if you just can't get yourself into it, maybe try reading one of the church magazines instead. They could help inspire you to think of something you could look up in the scriptures to study some more.

taisama · #9 (**permalink**) 10-18-2008, 01:02 PM

Thanks to everyone for posting! You guys gave me some great advice. I think I will try to start reading a church magazine and saying my prayers and hopefully it will help.

countrygirl66 · #10 (**permalink**) 10-18-2008, 08:37 PM

hi taisama,
I have a 15 year old son who is also struggling. He isn't sure if the church is true and though he doesn't have a pornography addiction it is a huge temptation for him and could easily become an addiction. He experimented with drugs this summer and we found out. I took him and turned him in to the police and let the consequences fall and then we grounded him for the summer. I guess it is no suprise that we haven't been his favorite people. He really struggles with anger also. He goes to seminary but hates it, he goes to church and young mens but hates it also. I just wanted to say from a parents perspective that we love him more than life and are trying to do the best we can for him. Ultimately we know the change will have to come from within. We have seen some improvement as he has started earning back privledges but he still gets really angry that we don't completely trust him. I think heavenly father is the one who will know how to best touch his heart and that is what we pray for. My only advice to you would be to study the story of alma the younger. He had such struggles, but with the lords help had a mighty change of heart. The lord will never force that upon us but if we ask he will help us to achieve it. Good luck and I hope you find the answers you are looking for. Take care and be gentle with your family, they probably love you more than you realize.