Moral Question

[john doe]

Originally Posted by georgia2

okay! Thanks everyone! I guess I'm just a bum!!!
I no longer have the license # because it happened several months ago and I went with my husbands advice. SO, do I now have To go tell my Bishop? PLEASE SAY NO!!!!!

If it's still bothering you after all these months, perhaps you should talk to him, if for no other reason than to help you clear your conscience. It would be almost impossible to track down that person now, though, so I doubt there is anything you can do about it.

[Elgama]

I wanted to come back and I agree with what johndoe says either that or could your husband give you a blessing?
-Charley

[DirtyPool]

If your old enough to drive, be married, maybe kids then why can't you answer this question on your own? I bet that you have had enough life experiences to get through this without posting to the internet.

[applepansy]

I would leave the note on the car with my Name and phone number. And I would call the insurance company to explain the circumstances. I would also get the name of the parking attendant and a contact number.

The scriptures that come to mind are Matthew 5:25 and 3 Nephi 12:25.

applepansy

[TheLutheran]

Originally Posted by georgia2

. . . I had something happen and I didn't know what was right or what was wrong.

. . . I knew if I reported it my insurance would go up. I knew the other car would want and expect payment of the dent. . . .

The Lord says "Thou shalt not steal" and you, in effect, stole a portion of the value of this car. You should have, at least, left the note with your contact information. Had you stayed, you might have resolved the issue with the car owner on the spot. Perhaps they would have conceded that they were parked illegally and agreed to split the cost of repair. Or, you would have rectified the situation with the person damaged with no prolonged remorse and no need to involve the Bishop.

Its very difficult to respond appropriately in circumstances like this. Going back to the basics (and cutting out all the rationalizations and emotions) works best for me.

[DirtyPool]

Originally Posted by john doe

If it's still bothering you after all these months, perhaps you should talk to him, if for no other reason than to help you clear your conscience. It would be almost impossible to track down that person now, though, so I doubt there is anything you can do about it.

I had an old friend come to me years later and tell me that he was sorry for stealing some music equipment from me in high school. It was worth a few hundred dollars and I barely remember missing it. I thought the guy was kind of an idiot to come back and apologize after so much time had passed. It was not a ton of money nor was any major crime (assualt, felony) committed.

I think we include the reparations portion of forgivness into too many small incidents in life. Sometimes it is just better for all involved to just move on>

I hope I am not encouraging you to dissobey a commandment, but maybe you should just move on.

[SisterofJared]

DirtyPool, Hey, I'm proud of your friend that came back and apologized years later. That shows a truly repentent heart.... it would have been easy to just move out. But the guys character grew from the apology, and he definately proved that he loved God more than himself. Way cool!

I think the OP needs to do her best to repent.... repentence is about making it right when possible, and changing direction... since she doesn't have the name of the owner of the car, changing direction is what is called for in this situation. Study the situation and pray about it until your heart is convinced that it was wrong to not settle with the owner of the car... once you are convinced it was wrong, then pray and ask for forgivenss, and promise that you will not do the same thing again. Then forgive yourself as God forgives you. Move on!

And don't feel like such a bum about it! Almost all of us will remember times when we were less than honest... we remember the repentence process and the change. Few people are just born brimming with honest.... we require as we grow. It's a process. Be happy that you are arriving at that point!

Sister of Jared.

[Truegrits]

Two times my car was "dinged" while parked in a six floor parking garage. Both times the person responsible did the right thing, and left a note with their name and telephone number. One was of such minor consequence, I told the person to forget it, but that I very much appreciated their honesty. The second one was of more consequence, but not that much money, and they paid "out of pocket."
My thinking is, even if the other person is illegally parked, and you hit them, you are responsible. Two wrongs have never made a thing "right".
And the fact that you are still agonizing over the situation, shows that you are not easy with the choice you made. Even though at this point there is very little chance of you "making it right" for that person, you have learned from the experience. Honesty and peace of mind is of more worth than some monetary savings.

[georgia2]

Thanks guys.
I'm not agonizing over it I just thought I would post it to see what others opinions were. I truly didn't know if I was responsible because the other car was parked illegally and I couldn't even move! That is why I went back and forth, then decided to get the info, ask my insurance guy, Then hubby said "forget it". Obviously he didn't know it is wrong to hit an illegally parked car either.
See, now I know and if this sort of thing EVER comes up again, I'll know what to do.

[Palerider]

I would have left a note on car and if I have a cell phone and able to take pictures with it....I would have taken a few pics of both cars..