Anger Management

[Heavenguard]

I just wanted to ask you guys how you deal with anger? What kind of angry person are you when you do get angry?

Personally, I'm a fairly easy-going person most of the time. But I can get pushed to the point where the anger becomes extremely unhealthy for me because I take it out on myself. My parents have told me that when I was a baby and was crying, I would smash my head into the floor, wall, etc. Well, it seems that 23 years later, I'm no better. (I was very angry about 1/2 hr ago, and now my head hurts, so I can't sleep, and now I'm roaming around on the internets...)

I hadn't gotten to this level of anger where I would be self-abusive in 5+ years, but it seems old habits die hard? I've gotten pretty good at talking about my feelings to try to resolve the issue, but it'll still happen when my words are ignored and then I stew about it and I make myself more and more angry and I don't have another way to deal with it.

My workplace has some assistance program for its employees, I'm looking at the brochure now and I think I'll give them a call on how to better, properly deal with my emotions of anger. But in the meantime, in the spirit that sharing is caring ... do share?

[Islander]

Originally Posted by Heavenguard

I just wanted to ask you guys how you deal with anger? What kind of angry person are you when you do get angry?

I hadn't gotten to this level of anger where I would be self-abusive in 5+ years, but it seems old habits die hard? I've gotten pretty good at talking about my feelings to try to resolve the issue, but it'll still happen when my words are ignored and then I stew about it and I make myself more and more angry and I don't have another way to deal with it.

My workplace has some assistance program for its employees, I'm looking at the brochure now and I think I'll give them a call on how to better, properly deal with my emotions of anger. But in the meantime, in the spirit that sharing is caring ... do share?

Anger is a learned response like many other behaviors. It is a reaction rather than an emotion and thus, in some people, a maladaptive response to normal environmental stressors. In other words, since you were little you learned to react violently under certain circumstances. In small children is an attempt to manipulate the situation and get attention and it usually works so they keep repeating the behavior into adulthood.

You should try and get some counseling and coaching to develop healthier response and coping mechanisms, as to deal with everyday life issues without biting somebody's head off. Not only that, angry people suffer hypertension, cardiovascular disease, ulcer, anxiety and tension headaches four times more than the general population.

So, chillax!!!

[dazed-and-confused]

While I was studying meditation, I often found myself feeling great anger, which surprised me because i expected the exact opposite effect......but i did learn how to better identify what it was i was angry about (in those cases, it was just burried anger that was "coming out" finally) and to let go of it as best i could/can.By the way, i was also taught that for every minute you spend angry, you lose 5 minutes of life.