A question of etiquette

HEthePrimate · #1 (**permalink**) 06-30-2009, 03:04 PM

The 3-year anniversary of my wife's death is coming up on Sunday, and I don't want to go home from church and spend the rest of the day alone. My place is tiny, and a wreck, and I don't feel comfortable having company at this time, and I'm not one to invite myself over to others' places. What should I do?

HEP

Maureen · #2 (**permalink**) 06-30-2009, 03:35 PM

I would try to invite yourself over to a friend's home for the day.

beefche · #3 (**permalink**) 06-30-2009, 04:06 PM

Does your stake do the Fast Sunday baptism for everyone day? If so, you can attend that. Call your ward mission leader to find out if they do and where it is.

You can have a picnic at your wife's gravesite. Talk to her and enjoy a sandwich with her.

Call a good friend and invite yourself over for dinner and games or dinner and talking. You said you don't like to invite yourself to people's homes, but if you call a friend, it's not "inviting" yourself over--you're just setting up a time to see your friend, at his/her house. I wouldn't have a problem if a friend said, "hey! I'm coming over for dinner! Want me to bring dessert?"

Does your town have a free concert or some other free event? You could attend that (depends on what you feel is appropriate for Sunday activities).

#4 (**permalink**) 06-30-2009, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HEthePrimate

. . . What should I do? . . .

Would you like to remember and honor your wife on that day in a special way, or are you hoping to just make it through a very difficult anniversary? Do you need to be with others after services? Are there friends or relatives (either yours or your wife's . . . or both!) that would like to share this day with you? Don't be afraid to be real and honest with where you are in the grieving process. If you would appreciate companionship . . . let people know!!

You're in my prayers.

Heavenguard · #5 (**permalink**) 06-30-2009, 04:34 PM

You don't necessarily have to invite yourself to someone's home, or someone to your home. Perhaps you could ask a friend to enjoy the afternoon out with you, maybe bringing a snack or drink to the park or something. Perhaps someone who was also close to your wife as well, then you can remember her together.