Finding your way back isnt easy

LDSpunkrocker · #1 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 09:59 PM

Hello, i just signed up on the board. my name is Sam and i have been inactive in the church since i was 18, i recently celebrated my 33rd birthday. Well i thought since i just signed up i would offer a bit of my background. I was born into the church and the majority of my family have been continuously active members apart from some other relatives myself and my two brothers. I have been rebellious ever since i can remember, i have always had a problem with authority etc etc. i found my way into the punk rock scene when i was around 12/13 years old and of course me being the rebel i was i loved the anti authoritarian attitude of the music. It wasnt long before i got involved with drugs, drinking and various criminal activities, short story, i had strayed far from the church but in the back of my head the principals i learned as a kid would always remind me of how i was living was wrong, sure i tried to deny the existence of god so i could justify my actions and yet i always knew i was doing wrong. fast forward to a few years ago, i had become involved with the occult, addicted to narcotic pain killers and in a deep depression, while reading through some occult publications i ran across an article talking about the book holy blood holy grail ( for those who are unaware of this book it talks about the same subject as the davinci code..id rather not go into detail because for me it invites an unholy spirit) after reading about these "conspiracy theories" on jesus and mary i decided to start researching the bible and eventualy the book of mormon again. i decided to go back to school and took some religious history classes and began to read the scriptures more and start praying again. i have left most of my previous practices and lifestyle behind now but i am still struggling with some word of wisdom problems. i still have not been to church in a long time but i am reading the scriptures and listening to material available on lds.org, i hope that soon i can get the courage to abandon fully my former life and become an active member again. sometimes i feel like i needed to go down that path to learn first hand the dangers but man i wish i would have just taken my parents word for it

sorry for the rambling, im a bit scatterbrained at times.

Lbybug · #2 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 10:03 PM

welcome sam. nice to have you. we like rambling

enjoy your stay.

LDSpunkrocker · #3 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lbybug

welcome sam. nice to have you. we like rambling

enjoy your stay.

thank you very much, im good at rambling lol

Truegrits · #4 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 10:21 PM

Hello Sam...welcome to the site. We all need to find our own Testimony. Some travel a long, bumpy road, huh?

Honor · #5 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 10:21 PM

Welcome - I'm glad you found this site. I've been an active member my whole life and sometimes I feel like I don't give it my all because I don't know what it's like to be without it. Definitely not a valid reason to stray from it - I know it would bring heartache in the end, but I still wonder. It's amazing where the path of life takes us and how no matter what things we may do wrong, our Heavenly Father isn't willing to let us go that easy. He'll always keep trying to bring us back. Glad to have you here!

LDSpunkrocker · #6 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Truegrits

Hello Sam...welcome to the site. We all need to find our own Testimony. Some travel a long, bumpy road, huh?

so true. reminds me of the quote "i never said it would be easy" it sure hasnt been haha

LDSpunkrocker · #7 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 10:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Honor

Welcome - I'm glad you found this site. I've been an active member my whole life and sometimes I feel like I don't give it my all because I don't know what it's like to be without it. Definitely not a valid reason to stray from it - I know it would bring heartache in the end, but I still wonder. It's amazing where the path of life takes us and how no matter what things we may do wrong, our Heavenly Father isn't willing to let us go that easy. He'll always keep trying to bring us back. Glad to have you here!

for me being without it had left a empty void in my soul that i tried to fill with all the wrong things. looking back heavenly father had still blessed me so much and even protected me a few times when i probably didnt deserve it. i am thankful for that

Palerider · #8 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 10:38 PM

welcome back and welcome to the site....

JHM-in-Bountiful · #9 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 11:01 PM

I'm glad you found this site and also visiting lds.org. Our stories, in general, are very similar. I left the church to pursue other interests. I eventually came back and am now happy. One avenue I pursued in returning was using the addiction recovery program offered by he church. It's a 12 step program and is based on other 12 step programs. I don't know if you need or would be interested in the program. It is avaliable in many church stakes and is confindental. Here is a link for more info. LDS Recovery There is a workbook you can download. It goes along with the program. It takes alot of courage to come back to the church. Many people do not do so because they feel they have been too unworthy. No one is ever too unworthy to come back. Heavenly Father and many others are pleased with your courage and conviction. Keep working at it!

Sincerely, John

siouxz72 · #10 (**permalink**) 09-29-2008, 11:25 PM

Welcome, Sam! I like your hat. And your dog. I'm glad you shared part of your story with us and that you're slowly finding your way back. That's pretty sweet. Hope you enjoy it here! (I know I do)