Feeling a bit lost

[cgrantreed]

Wanderer,

I was not born in the church but became a convert later in my life. Even with the knowledge I had and the testimony that was burning in my heart I still chose to go by the wayside for a few years. For some it is hard to conform to the ways of the church. For some its easy. The part that makes it hard is that the adversary doesn't want you to do it right. No one will ever tell you outright that doing something that is bad for you is wrong because that is a choice you have to make for yourself. Satan loves that and he will not try and stop you. But when you make the choice to give yourself to God, Satan gets his undies in a bunch and tries to prevent it. People that don't believe in God or believe in falsehoods about Him will try and change your mind about what you believe. That is why it was hard for me to stick to what I knew was right for me. I didn't want to fight it. The bottom line is this : God never said this life would be easy...He just said it would be worth it.

Don't ever take anything that anyone says as gospel. God wants you to try it and test it for the truth. When you do, He will show you its importance in your life. I will give you some examples from my own experience. I smoked cigarettes for 9 years. I knew that it was bad for me and it was against the churches health code (Word of Wisdom). I did it anyway. My health was failing pretty rapidly and I was miserable. I put my faith in the Lord to help me stop so that i could live and He gave me that help. My health has returned and I feel so much better because of it. It was hard to stop but I know that God was watching over me in this quest.

Tithing is a sticky one with people too. I used to pay my tithing religiously, no pun intended. I did it just to be obedient to the laws of God as it was in the scriptures. Never thought much of it. Then one time when money got tight i stopped paying it so that i could cover a bill that needed to be paid. My finances went into the toilet and I could not explain why but it was awful. I almost had the power turned off and I prayed for help and I just felt that I needed to pay my tithing and leave it in the Lords hands. I paid it and wondered where the next days meals for my family would come from. The next morning a check came in the mail for something that was owed to me from WAAAY back that I had forgotten about. I never expected to get that money back but it came when i needed it the most. It was enough to pay the power bill and buy a bunch of groceries. Dude!!!! I'm telling you, I have never missed my tithing since. I also have never had a time where I could not take care of my necessary expenses. This list goes on and on for me. These confirmations of the truths have built me up to where it is not hard for me to follow God anymore. I question everything that i read to make sure that its the gospel truth and I get confirmation when i ask for it.

Our Heavenly Father guarantees this:
7 ¶ Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:Matthew 7:7
The truth is out there and I believe for myself. No I KNOW for myself that I have found the truth of Him in the LDS faith. This is MY testimony. for ME, and I KNOW deep in my heart that its true. Keep searching for it Brother. You will gain a knowledge that will forever change your life. You may run into some that will try and change your views. Seek to KNOW it for yourself and they will have no power over you.

God Bless
Your humble Brother in God
Grant

[inthearmsofsleep]

Originally Posted by cgrantreed

Wanderer,

I was not born in the church but became a convert later in my life. Even with the knowledge I had and the testimony that was burning in my heart I still chose to go by the wayside for a few years. For some it is hard to conform to the ways of the church. For some its easy. The part that makes it hard is that the adversary doesn't want you to do it right. No one will ever tell you outright that doing something that is bad for you is wrong because that is a choice you have to make for yourself. Satan loves that and he will not try and stop you. But when you make the choice to give yourself to God, Satan gets his undies in a bunch and tries to prevent it. People that don't believe in God or believe in falsehoods about Him will try and change your mind about what you believe. That is why it was hard for me to stick to what I knew was right for me. I didn't want to fight it. The bottom line is this : God never said this life would be easy...He just said it would be worth it.

Don't ever take anything that anyone says as gospel. God wants you to try it and test it for the truth. When you do, He will show you its importance in your life. I will give you some examples from my own experience. I smoked cigarettes for 9 years. I knew that it was bad for me and it was against the churches health code (Word of Wisdom). I did it anyway. My health was failing pretty rapidly and I was miserable. I put my faith in the Lord to help me stop so that i could live and He gave me that help. My health has returned and I feel so much better because of it. It was hard to stop but I know that God was watching over me in this quest.

Tithing is a sticky one with people too. I used to pay my tithing religiously, no pun intended. I did it just to be obedient to the laws of God as it was in the scriptures. Never thought much of it. Then one time when money got tight i stopped paying it so that i could cover a bill that needed to be paid. My finances went into the toilet and I could not explain why but it was awful. I almost had the power turned off and I prayed for help and I just felt that I needed to pay my tithing and leave it in the Lords hands. I paid it and wondered where the next days meals for my family would come from. The next morning a check came in the mail for something that was owed to me from WAAAY back that I had forgotten about. I never expected to get that money back but it came when i needed it the most. It was enough to pay the power bill and buy a bunch of groceries. Dude!!!! I'm telling you, I have never missed my tithing since. I also have never had a time where I could not take care of my necessary expenses. This list goes on and on for me. These confirmations of the truths have built me up to where it is not hard for me to follow God anymore. I question everything that i read to make sure that its the gospel truth and I get confirmation when i ask for it.

Our Heavenly Father guarantees this:
7 ¶ Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:Matthew 7:7
The truth is out there and I believe for myself. No I KNOW for myself that I have found the truth of Him in the LDS faith. This is MY testimony. for ME, and I KNOW deep in my heart that its true. Keep searching for it Brother. You will gain a knowledge that will forever change your life. You may run into some that will try and change your views. Seek to KNOW it for yourself and they will have no power over you.

God Bless
Your humble Brother in God
Grant

Thanks for all your great, long responses in so many of these threads Grant!

[cgrantreed]

Originally Posted by WANDERER

Grant, I can relate to what you are saying...thankyou for sharing.


I'm a girl. : )

Whoops Sorry I guess I need to revise the use of that phrase huh? Lol

Well then... Sister:-) I won't hose that up again I promise.

[HoosierGuy]

Wanderer, I want to thank you. Monday I went to meet
missionaries at the church. I have never done anything like this
in my life. As I was driving to the place, I was scared and
nervous. I kept thinking about the Heavenly Father and Jesus,
the things I have read, and the people here on this board.

Sunday night I read the little quote you have under your posts:

People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within. Elizabeth Kubler Ross


As I was driving to the church I remembered that and it really helped.
I said to myself - I'm scared now. Now is the time to show my faith.
When I'm not safely behind a compute screen but going to meet real
people and talking about all this - now is the time for my faith to shine.


Thanks for that Wanderer, you really helped me.

[jadams_4040]

Originally Posted by WANDERER

I come from a fundamentalist Christian upbringing. I moved away from that when I went to college and I guess tried to avoid any involvement in religion at all.

Posting on this forum is a huge step for me, you wouldn't believed how scared I am just to do this teensy thing. I have been trying to find out as much as I can about what it means to become a Mormon and what Mormons believe. I was visited by some elders regularly in the past and I have the strongest feeling of regrets about that. You know I offered them coffee for each and every visit, not exactly the right thing to do but I was pretty ignorant, and while I wanted to know more, you can understand from my upbringing that the line was too hard to cross.

I look at what it means to live the 'walk' and I think I can't possibly do what Mormons do...they do so much. I mean I live on coffee, have mostly clothing that would be considered indecent, smoke...yep general feelings of unworthiness and stuff. I look at 3 hour services, ten percent tithing, missions and all that stuff and the discipline and standards and think I can't possibly do what you guys do...that I will fail dismally. Not to mention coping with anti-Mormon flak.

While I have the strongest wish to open the door and go where my heart is...I'm just staring at the doorway if you know what I mean.

Go and open the door to the spirit, let him in, then sincerly follow his guidance, he will show you beauty and wonders you have never known before, a little at a time as you go, if you are sincere and honest with the lord he will not let you down, he will direct you. It took me 50 years to get up the courage to buckle down and do the things that i knew i had to do, but now its all over and i would never in a million years even think about going back! this is sssooo wonderfull! there are so many blessings involved that cannot be put into words. Its true! And how great and beautufull it is.

[WillowTheWhisp]

HoosierGuy, I feel so chuffed that you arranged and met up with the missionaries. I suppose for those of us who are members of the Church we don't always realise what a big step this must be for people and how much courage it can take sometimes to just take that first step.

[AutumnBreez]

Originally Posted by WANDERER

I come from a fundamentalist Christian upbringing. I moved away from that when I went to college and I guess tried to avoid any involvement in religion at all.

Posting on this forum is a huge step for me, you wouldn't believed how scared I am just to do this teensy thing. I have been trying to find out as much as I can about what it means to become a Mormon and what Mormons believe. I was visited by some elders regularly in the past and I have the strongest feeling of regrets about that. You know I offered them coffee for each and every visit, not exactly the right thing to do but I was pretty ignorant, and while I wanted to know more, you can understand from my upbringing that the line was too hard to cross.

I look at what it means to live the 'walk' and I think I can't possibly do what Mormons do...they do so much. I mean I live on coffee, have mostly clothing that would be considered indecent, smoke...yep general feelings of unworthiness and stuff. I look at 3 hour services, ten percent tithing, missions and all that stuff and the discipline and standards and think I can't possibly do what you guys do...that I will fail dismally. Not to mention coping with anti-Mormon flak.

While I have the strongest wish to open the door and go where my heart is...I'm just staring at the doorway if you know what I mean.

Wanderer-
If you are walking down the street, do you know what each person you pass believes? Probably not, and neither do they. Only if you are walking with a sign in front of you that states your religion. You probably would not do that either.
You come to any internet site that is labelled MORMON it is going to be there for those who are either members, interested in learning earnestly,or those who have issues beyond Mormonism but can't see their problem, if they are here to give flak, let them give it. Funny thing is...some get smart and realize that there are many conflicts in their own anti story to keep going and join the church. ANTI's- They are generally not here out of love and concern because they genuinely care about us. Knowing that this portion of life is all temporary and what I do for my eternal salvation is more important then anything they could ever say. There is more pity and sorrow for them in my heart that they are being so hard hearted.
Giving up coffee- I did it. Avid drinker for years. 2-3 c. a day.
My husband still drinks it. I stopped- once I realized that my Heavenly Father sincerly loves me and he wants my body reserved for his work, he loves others and I can not help him if I am poisoned and dead-
It's not really my body to do with it as I please. It is mainstream yet ignorant to think-if it doesn't hurt anyone else then it is ok- you are his instrument. This does not mean you are not to enjoy life either.

Coffee, tea, cigarettes and what is lerking within:
Cadmium - Elson M. Haas M.D. - HealthWorld Online
Coffee and Tea
TOXIC METAL SYNDRONE: HOW METAL POISONINGS CAN AFFECT YOUR BRAIN

You mentioned clothes....indecent, what makes them indecent? can you add something to make it decent? don't get so hard on yourself, you can gradually change, if it is money for new clothes you are worried about- that problem works itself out if you are paying tithing with a heart of gratitude. Your outlook and attitude changes as you allow the spirit to dwell and grow. Changes you may have tried to make and failed on your own are not in comparison to the changes that are possible with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ in your life. You will see progress when you have them in your life.
What do you want after this portion of life, once you pass over? I bet clothes and coffee will not be on that list if you are deep in thought.

Wanderer-You are a Child of God. He is great, so must you and I be. Take care-AB

[AutumnBreez]

Generally I don't think Mormons get flak on a normal basis, in their non internet day to day lives. You may experience someone that has misconceived ideas and you may have to show or tell them them the realistic view, by living the way you know is right, the wrinkles work themselves out. It is usually a missionary moment that arrives, not a conflicting moment.

[WillowTheWhisp]

Before I got baptised my skirts were what I now consider too short. A few days before my baptism I bought some lengths of broderie anglais and lengthened the skirts by adding an imitation underskirt just under the hem in a matching colour.

My daughter has some strappy tops but she wears them over matching t-shirts. There are many ways round the clothing problem.

[rameumptom]

Originally Posted by WANDERER

I come from a fundamentalist Christian upbringing. I moved away from that when I went to college and I guess tried to avoid any involvement in religion at all.

Posting on this forum is a huge step for me, you wouldn't believed how scared I am just to do this teensy thing. I have been trying to find out as much as I can about what it means to become a Mormon and what Mormons believe. I was visited by some elders regularly in the past and I have the strongest feeling of regrets about that. You know I offered them coffee for each and every visit, not exactly the right thing to do but I was pretty ignorant, and while I wanted to know more, you can understand from my upbringing that the line was too hard to cross.

I look at what it means to live the 'walk' and I think I can't possibly do what Mormons do...they do so much. I mean I live on coffee, have mostly clothing that would be considered indecent, smoke...yep general feelings of unworthiness and stuff. I look at 3 hour services, ten percent tithing, missions and all that stuff and the discipline and standards and think I can't possibly do what you guys do...that I will fail dismally. Not to mention coping with anti-Mormon flak.

While I have the strongest wish to open the door and go where my heart is...I'm just staring at the doorway if you know what I mean.

I suggest you take this as with eating an elephant: one bite at a time. If you cannot handle stopping coffee and smoking right now, then work on the things within your comfort zone. Talk stuff here. Read the Book of Mormon. Attend Church (preferably LDS services, but anywhere is better than nowhere), even if it is only Sacrament meeting or Sunday School.

Little by little, as you get accustomed to doing something, and it becomes easier for you, you will then be ready to take the next step - whatever that might be.

LDS teach that we all learn and grow "line upon line, precept upon precept." Sometimes we have huge/quick changes in our lives (Significant Emotional Events) that cause huge upheavals and changes in our lives. Most of the time, we change a little at a time. Most of us do not have a Joseph Smith First Vision or Paul seeing Christ event. Most of us gain our testimonies through study and prayer over time, with the Holy Ghost guiding and building us as we go along and are ready for the next level of growth.

So, if you aren't ready to take it all on at once, no problem. In the Book of Mormon, King Benjamin told us that we should not run faster than we are able, but we should be moving in the right direction. If you cannot run, then you should still try to walk or hobble as best you can. God will help you, and with time you will be strong enough to stop smoking and drinking coffee and will manage other weaknesses, as well. Interestingly, even after 32 years in the Church, I find I still have weaknesses and issues to overcome - so I keep on walking in the right direction, believing that Christ will help me to overcome all my weaknesses in His own time.