~ *** Please Rescue Me: Ought I Ditch Him? *** ~

[lotsofbabies]

What ought I do?

there's this boy i like. i meet him because i wanted a dancing partner. i've never been dancing before and it was the perfect time. and i find him stunningly handsome and really really attractive. problem is, that he's really shy ='( maybe even on the brink of, dare i say, frighten. i still love him no matter what though.

we're great for each other, but he just doesn't understand. i told him that i can go if he wanted me to, and that he can go in turn. but he's so indecisive, and he doesn't know what to say.

one time, i think i cried for a stream of a week. i took a break the following week, but the week after that, i started flooding again. i really want him in my life, and i really want us to share us life together. but isn't it silly to practise patience and wait years for him to come around? because the worst case scenario worries me a bundle ='( -- of not happy things.

at times, i feel like i should just ditch him right now. but dedication is just wholly key and heartfelt to me. and it would be unthinkable to breach that.

i know, i know, we'll be together, eventually. but you see, eventually hurts a lot in the interval.

[pam]

Have you even gone out on an official date with him?

[Eowyn]

It sounds like it would be good for both of you to take some time to grow on your own before worrying about together forever and having lots of babies.

[SpiritDragon]

I know in this age of text messages and emails and quirky relationship games the idea of actually talking to the person directly to communicate has become somewhat forgotten. However, it is likely the best method to actually communicate feelings... and I would say pre-requisite to any kind of real relationship.

So if you guys are actually in some kind of relationship than talk it out. If you are not actually in a relationship, but wish you were, it might help to drop some hints. You should also be aware of the fact that guys often don't pick up on what girls consider subtle hints, it may seem more like dropping a piano on his head, but with caution at the same time so as not to scare him away. However, if he reciprocates interest he shouldn't scare too easily. So if he does run you just saved yourself some time.

Also, if you are not in a relationship yet and other guys come calling, it is probably a good idea to test the waters and see what they have to offer.

Anyway I don't know enough about you or the situation to give any great help. Pray about it... personal revelation can work wonders in the hunt for an eternal companion.

[SoCal_Counselor]

After reading your original posts it sounds like you are trying to rationalize why you should stay with him. Just so you know, problems do not go away after marriage. In fact, marriage has a way of magnifying already existent problems within the relationship. I liked what Eowyn said about taking some time to grow on your own. Before you Find the right person to marry, you need to BE the right person.

[Wesmoney1]

I agree with Eowyn and socal. One of my favorite quotes is "Nobody will ever love you until you love yourself." I have been in a similar situation and decided that I would limit my contact with that person and really work on bettering myself. Distance makes the heart grow fonder so who knows what could happen if you take a little time away from him

[lotsofbabies]

this is SO UPSETTING. i can't even begin to think about this. so much more happier if i didn't check back.

i don't think anybody really knows how to go about this ='(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

i was going to login to facebook and msg "I <3 U" again but i can't even think about this right now. i'm just going to leave it for another month because that will do absolutely NOTHING =))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[skippy740]

#1. Calm down. Multiple postings of punctuation marks is a sign of immaturity and 'panic mode'.

#2. You're 20 years old... and you seem to be acting like you're 14. You need to get a grip on reality and act closer to your age.

Missionary service has a lowered age requirement for sisters... and I would strongly consider service to help focus your mind and exit the 'dating scene'.

#3 is a personal preference, but please use proper capitalization for your sentences. Even if you're posting from a phone, it's annoying to see a sentence start with a lower case letter.

[Tinglegirl]

Hear-hear Skip. My words and thoughts exactly. Those two need to grow up---Lotsofbabies especially. She is aptly named.