"large" problem

blinky · #1 (**permalink**) 03-11-2013, 11:23 PM

Friends of ours have a son who will be turing 18 early next year, and is planning to serve a mission. The problem is, he is quite overweight (as is the rest of the family) and nobody seems too concerned about that fact. Does the church still have weight restrictions for missionaries?

If so, how does one bring that up with them without hurting feelings. If he started now, he would have time to diet and exercise and get it under control.

annewandering · #2 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 12:17 AM

If you arent his bishop or parent or doctor its really not your place to say anything about it.

skippy740 · #3 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 01:22 AM

There was a missionary in my mission who was probably about 400 lbs. He was quite large. And yes, he was on a bike and never seemed to lose the weight, from what I could tell.

Just as Anne said - I wouldn't worry about it. If anything, it may restrict his service to being in the United States and not be eligible for foreign missionary service.

LiterateParakeet · #4 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 05:32 AM

You know there are so many factors at play in why people are overweight....try not to be judgmental. If all our sins and weaknesses were visible, wouldn't life get interesting?

blinky · #5 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 09:55 PM

My wife and I are concerned for both his physical and emotional well being. We are shocked at times by the amount of food he can pack away! Their whole family is excited about him serving, and now that the age was lowered, it's coming sooner than before. I would hate to have him be rejected or delayed because he weighed too much.

My brother served in 2004 (and I way back in 1996) after the "rasing the bar" talk in confrence, and he had to lose a little before he could go. In the research i've done, there was reference to having your BMI being 37 or under to qualify, and I wanted to know if it was still in effect. Better he knows now and has time to prepare for it.

Vort · #6 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 10:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blinky

My wife and I are concerned for both his physical and emotional well being. We are shocked at times by the amount of food he can pack away! Their whole family is excited about him serving, and now that the age was lowered, it's coming sooner than before. I would hate to have him be rejected or delayed because he weighed too much.

My brother served in 2004 (and I way back in 1996) after the "rasing the bar" talk in confrence, and he had to lose a little before he could go. In the research i've done, there was reference to having your BMI being 37 or under to qualify, and I wanted to know if it was still in effect. Better he knows now and has time to prepare for it.

I'm sure his bishop and stake president will work with him on such issues as they help him prepare.

Eowyn · #7 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 10:51 PM

M.Y.O.B.

If there are concerns they are not yours, and they will come up in his physical.

dahlia · #8 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 11:13 PM

OK, maybe it's not our business, but now I'm curious. : ) I have seen a few plump elders and sisters. I often wondered how some of them could walk/bike as much as they probably are expected to do. You'd think the Church wouldn't want some elder keeling over on his bike due to overexertion.

LiterateParakeet · #9 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 11:55 PM

Blinky, I'm sure you mean well. What I am trying to say, is that often there are emotional problems behind the weight issues and until you resolve one you cannot resolve the other. I could think of a handful of people I know who are obese, and there are serious emotional issues in each case. Yes, one is a family where all four of the oldest children are mobidly obese...their father was physically abusive. I know another woman who is 400 lbs, who was sexually abused. A man who was 300 lbs, same-sex attraction...

This is not limited to my experiences. Oprah once did a show on people who had that "stomach stapling surgery"...lap band or whatever it is....and how all those people turned to other addictions, drinking, gambling etc, because they had not addressed the emotional issues that caused them to become so overweight in the first place.

Even though your heart is in the right place, simply saying, "Hey you need to lose weight" is not going to help. Giving him a diet, and an exercise plan is not going to help. You have to get to the heart of the issue...what is the real cause of the problem.

pam · #10 (**permalink**) 03-12-2013, 11:56 PM

So this brings me to a question regarding the health side of a mission. Perhaps someone who has sent a missionary out can answer this.

So a physical is required to submit papers. Does the actual doctor do the recommendation or do they submit medical records to the church and it's determined that way if they are able to serve physically? I guess my question is..who has the final decision if someone is physically able to serve?