Grades

[kathysmike]

My son who is 12 lives with his mother. I try and talk with him at least a couple of evenings a week on my way home from work, asking about school and the like. Yesterday I left him a message to call me. When I got home his latest report card was waiting for me, he did OK except in math, which he failed. When he called he told me that he spent the evening at scouts working on a merit badge and talking about the campout he is going on this weekend. I mentioned his report card and asked about his math grade, he had no idea he had gotten an E. My question is how do I enforce or stress to him the importance of completing assignments and then turning them in. When I have no or little support from his mother,when I pick him up I always ask about homework and the answer is the same he already finished it. The one time we sat down with a third party to discuss such issues she asked what am I suppose to do when he Cole says "I don't want to take my homework to dad's?". Help...

[rameumptom]

Sounds like this is something you have to work through with his Mom. The two of you have to be on the same page, otherwise he will play you against one another. If she isn't willing to work with you, you do have legal options. Even a letter from a lawyer to her, stating your concerns that not enough is being done academically, might cause her to work better on these things, fearing going back to court.

Come up with 2 or three options to present to your Ex-wife. If she doesn't like them, have her come up with some possible options to consider. One might be that he doesn't do his extra-curricular activities until grades improve. A visit to the math teacher to get ideas on how to help might also be a good idea.