Modesty - A question in child rearing and clothing

[SeattleTruthSeeker]

My wife and I are expecting a little girl. She is 31 weeks along and we are scheduled for a C-Section on Nov. 23 if she does not go into labor.

We have discussed at length some parenting strategies that we would like to integrate in our parenting with this little girl. One of them is modesty and modest clothing and attire. We both agree that tank tops, even on infants and young girls are not something we are willing to allow.

So, our question is this: When is being too staunch in modesty and what ideas for those who have raised (or are raising) little girls where they have instilled some standards for what is allowed to be worn and not allowed to be worn?

[Jenamarie]

I have a 5 year old girl, and she also has not worn any tank tops or bikinis, even as a baby. I didn't want her seeing pictures of her as a baby in a bikini and asking "Why was it okay for me to wear those THEN, but not NOW?" Kids can spot hypocricy (even if it's hypocricy only by their own interpretation) and I wanted to avoid those fights (cuz I know I gave them to my parents!). We don't wear tank tops or bikinis because we don't. Period. Of course I'll teach about modesty and all that as well, but there aren't going to be seperate modesty standards presented by age or gender. My sons don't wear tank tops either, and if the trend of boys wearing their pants around their ankles is still around when they hit the teen years (Please, God, NO!) they won't be allowed to do so, whether they're showing skin or not.

[Jenamarie]

Oh, and of course, CONGRATS on your little girl!

[Hemidakota]

Originally Posted by SeattleTruthSeeker

My wife and I are expecting a little girl. She is 31 weeks along and we are scheduled for a C-Section on Nov. 23 if she does not go into labor.

We have discussed at length some parenting strategies that we would like to integrate in our parenting with this little girl. One of them is modesty and modest clothing and attire. We both agree that tank tops, even on infants and young girls are not something we are willing to allow.

So, our question is this: When is being too staunch in modesty and what ideas for those who have raised (or are raising) little girls where they have instilled some standards for what is allowed to be worn and not allowed to be worn?

Rearing six daughters, I do believe it is our right to teach modesty.

[hordak]

Originally Posted by Jenamarie

I have a 5 year old girl, and she also has not worn any tank tops or bikinis, even as a baby. I didn't want her seeing pictures of her as a baby in a bikini and asking "Why was it okay for me to wear those THEN, but not NOW?" Kids can spot hypocricy (even if it's hypocricy only by their own interpretation) and I wanted to avoid those fights (cuz I know I gave them to my parents!). We don't wear tank tops or bikinis because we don't. Period. Of course I'll teach about modesty and all that as well, but there aren't going to be seperate modesty standards presented by age or gender. My sons don't wear tank tops either, and if the trend of boys wearing their pants around their ankles is still around when they hit the teen years (Please, God, NO!) they won't be allowed to do so, whether they're showing skin or not.

Bingo

I have a 5 year old girl and i will not let her wear a 2 piece bathing suit. People say shes too young to worry about being provocative and perhaps i'm too strict. They way i see it is it is better to instill the rules now then trying to explain why they changed later.

When i was a little kid i never wore a bike helmet, i was low to the ground and didn't go that fast so my parents saw no reason for them. Then when i got older, rode farther, faster, and in traffic my father decided it was time for me to get one. Needless to say after years of not having one i didn't see any reason for it later and he couldn't get me to wear one when i really "needed" it.

Because of this experience i think it's best to start the standards you wish to enforce at a young age.

[pam]

I think it's never too young to teach modesty and what kind of dress is appropriate.

[Blackrockshooter]

I'm glad to see people taking this kind of resolution.
It makes me feel bad when I see little girls wearing miniskirts, minishorts, tank tops and sexy clothes. For heaven's sake, I even see thongs for girls in some markets, it's disgusting!

I miss the days when girls used to wear cute frilly dresses and actually looked like little girls.

[Generally_Me]

Originally Posted by Blackrockshooter

I'm glad to see people taking this kind of resolution.
It makes me feel bad when I see little girls wearing miniskirts, minishorts, tank tops and sexy clothes. For heaven's sake, I even see thongs for girls in some markets, it's disgusting!

I miss the days when girls used to wear cute frilly dresses and actually looked like little girls.

I miss those days too, and I've been trying for it myself. Here's another vote for, if you dress 'em right in the beginning, they'll know the standards before they get to the dressing themselves age.

Regarding the description by Blackrockshooter, they were talking about that on a TV show I watched a while back and said something like "Oh those mothers dress their kids like prostitots."

[Generally_Me]

Oh and Seattle, congrats on the new addition!

[maybeinNH]

I have done this with our four and a half year old. I just feel like if I teach her now the proper ways to dress it will not be a fight later on.