Please pray for us, we've lost our insurance

[MormonMama]

We were getting insurance through our state, as we cannot afford insurance through DH's work (it's almost half his take-home pay). We hadn't seen a doctor in a long time so when we finally got insurance through our state we had a bunch of tests done for our general health, as well as to find out why we haven't been able to get pregnant after three years of trying.

Last week DH was in the emergency room with chest pain and shortness of breath. Thankfully it turned out to be the relatively minor pleurisy, and he's doing okay now.

I have a broken wisdom tooth that has become infected, and I'm pretty sure the infection has spread to my jaw. The pain is excruciating. It keeps me up at night and makes it really hard to eat.

So we found out a few days ago that our insurance had been canceled awhile back because DH makes just a little bit too much to qualify. We found this out from our doctor, our state never even bothered to notify us. Turns out it was actually canceled last month and should never have even been instated in the first place. So now not only can I not get this tooth infection taken care of, all the medical work we've had lately, including DH's ER visit, is not covered. We're looking at probably thousands of dollars worth of medical bills and absolutely no way of paying them.

I am just sick with stress over this. We are constantly robbing Peter to pay Paul. The church has been paying many of our bills for over a year now. Last summer we had to have all our plumbing replaced due to repeated pipe bursts (they were very old and all rusted through). We had to put that on a credit card, so now we also have credit card debt we are trying to pay off. There is NO money left over at the end of the month. I don't know what we're going to do. I'm so sick of never being able to catch a break. I've been looking for work for months with no luck. I've literally applied at well over a hundred jobs and am still applying, and most of them tell me that they either aren't hiring at all or have already filled the one and only spot they had open. Many of them won't work around my school schedule and my kids' schedules. DH is already working two jobs as it is. Is it too much to ask that we could at least break even each month and not have to rely on others to help us pay for even the basic necessities of life?

To top it all off, I'm pretty sure I suffer from depression. I'll go for days or even weeks at a time where I just can't feel happy at all, I want to put a bullet in my head or just run away and forget the rest of the world exists. It's putting a huge strain on my marriage. With this insurance I was hoping to get into counseling, but now that's not going to happen either. I know I need help, and this whole situation is just making things worse. It's all I can do not to break down and cry right now.

I'm sorry this is so long. I just really need prayers right now. If anyone is going to the temple soon and would be willing to put my name on the prayer list, please PM me. I can use all the help I can get. I don't know how much more I and my family can tolerate. I'm about ready to give up.

[LDSVALLEY]

I am very sorry to read of your families problems. I wish I had solid advise for you but platitudes of sympathy or "it will be better tomorrow" would most likely be of little help. I am thankful my family lives in Canada where the medical, not dental, issues are covered at least. My insurance plan for dental, disability and life is only $25 per week. Maybe you should move to Canada! Our economy is sluggish but we seem to be keeping afloat better then the States at leas so far.

In Nova Scotia we have a government funded agency called Orderly Payment of Debts. Those who qualify have enough money to eventually pay down the amounts owed but not enough to do so without help. The Government works out a budget, you give the O.P.D. agency a set amount each month and they distribute to the creditors which can include government agencies. They also reduce your interest rate to zero or a minimal amount. The blessing of it is it is not bankruptcy, while a couple of credit agencies will refuse you credit after you are discharged most lending institutions will not and it doesn't count against the credit rating when you are discharged.

You might get lucky and find something like that in your state. I have found from personal experience that there is often help available but no one is willing to tell you about it unless you can pin them down about something specific. The other thing is the noisy wheel getting the grease is very true. A friend who worked for low income housing mentioned that they will say there are no homes available and have people on a waiting list but they keep a couple of units in reserve for those who cry long and loud or who are really stuck.

It sounds stupid but you might be better off if your husband worked a few less hours and qualified for benefits from the state. Talk to a legal aid lawyer about the medical bill, can you sue the state for not informing you before you ran up a debt since they had qualified you for it?

Check with your Bishop and members in your Ward, maybe complain to a news station that handles consumer complaints or people issues about what happened. Try your local political leaders. Contact the doctor, explain the situation and maybe the hospital lawyers will go after the state for you, after all from what you said it would be hard to get money from you. Often we except what is happening, at least I do, and don't put up a fight. Maybe you will not get anywhere but it can't make things much worse I would think.

Above all keep the faith, the Lord does loves us, it might seem hard to realize this at times. I would find it hard in your situation I think. We have a Ward temple trip in three weeks, I will pray for you and your family there. I am sorry I have no better suggestions or ways to help.

[Iggy]

Is there a Temp Agency where you are? Where they place employees in Temp spots?

That is how I got my job - I went through a Temp Agency. I got lucky first job out. After three months, they hired me full time. That was 4 years ago.

As for your tooth- if you DON'T get it taken care of, the infection could kill you. Start calling dentists and find one that will allow you to make monthly payments. Any Dentists in your Ward or Stake? I would try them first.

You can call the Temple and put your own and family names on the prayer roll.

Is your schooling a top priority? Is it a Need or a Want? Can it be set aside for a year or two so that you can get a job and bring in the needed income. Also are you paying your tithe?

[BenRaines]

I agree that it would be hard to find an employer who will work around your school schedule, your kids school schedule, etc. What must they be thinking?

Ben Raines

[MormonMama]

Thank you for the prayers and advice everyone. I really appreciate it. I've been told by a couple of different people that there is a dentist in my area who operates on a sliding-scale fee basis and takes payments, so I'm going to call them on Monday.

I have tried temp agencies but they haven't been able to find me much of anything. One job wanted me to travel over an hour away from home, and needed me during a time when I was still in school. The few others they offered wanted me at times that I just was not available (even though I gave them my availability).

Schooling is definitely a priority right now. Twice in the past I put my schooling on hold in order to work full-time, sometimes two or three jobs, until things "got better", and we're no better off today than we were then. I wish now that I'd never put school on hold. I would have been done by now, and in my state there is a fairly high demand for my degree field (Zoology and Fish and Wildlife Management; my state's Game and Fish Department has quite a few openings with pretty decent starting salaries, but only if you have that degree). Neither DH nor I have any real marketable job skills that don't come a dime a dozen among job applicants right now, and after a great deal of prayer last summer we both felt strongly inspired that one of us needed to complete a degree as quickly as possible. Since I've always been a better student and I know what I want to go to school for (he barely passed and has no idea what he'd want a degree in), it seemed logical for me to go to school.

I won't be in school for the summer, so hopefully I can find something then, if not sooner. At least then my availability will be completely open, and I'll have to worry about the fall semester later.

A friend also told me that when she was in the hospital (in another state) and couldn't pay her bill that they wrote off a big chunk of it. It was some type of "forgiveness program", so we're going to call our hospital and see if they have anything like that.

Thanks again everyone. Your support means a lot to me.