Priesthood Leadership Conundrum Number 3

[mormonmusic]

I was hoping someone else would pose a priesthood poser...but since no one has, here's another.

You are the High Priest Group Leader in your Ward. At a Stake High Priest meeting, the Stake President has announced that he wants more youth involvement in the new FamilySearch geneology software at FamilySearch.org - Family History and Genealogy Records. Youth are technically savvy, he says, and that this will also strengthen them spiritually. He also wants to see Wards call capable youth as family history consultants given their familiarity with technology, and their ability to share this knowledge with others.

You go to a local university where you have a relationship with the IT director and president. They agree to let you use a room full of 30 computers that are Internet-ready, and suitable for training people in the new FamilySearch program. You of course asked this as "an exploratory question" -- and have not yet committed to a date, or whether you'll use the facility at all. Nor is the university expecting you to use it. But you know it's available for this purpose if you wish.

You talk to the Bishop about the possiblity of a HP Group sponsored activity for the youth to go to the university and learn to use the new FamilySearch program. He thinks it's a great idea.

I have two questions:

1) How do you proceed with the idea to train the youth in the new FamilySearch program in the University Computer lab?

2) How do you proceed in getting youth family-history consultants called? Assume you have a lot of suitable youth to consider calling (whether you agree with youth being family history consultants or not).

This one really blew up in my face -- BADLY. So I'm intersested in how others think one should proceed....

[Vort]

Ouch. Sorry to hear it.

How would I proceed? I suppose I'd go roughly as follows:

1. Ask the bishop to call the youth family history consultants - perhaps giving him a list of people I think would be qualified. Then get a list from him of those who have been called.
2. Talk with the youth and their parents about what you want to do (take them to the college campus and train them on the new program). Find a best time to go.
3. As a part of the previous step, explain what the youths' responsibilities will be before and after the training, so that you don't end up with a bunch of youth trained on the new program who have no idea what they are supposed to do with the knowledge.
4. Set up that time with the computer lab.
5. If/When everything is worked out, do the lab session and teach the program.
6. Report back to the bishop how everything went.

I assume you did something like the above and it "blew up". Care to elaborate?

[MarginOfError]

It seems like a perfectly good idea to me. I'm also interested in knowing why it blew up.

[Misshalfway]

Originally Posted by MarginOfError

It seems like a perfectly good idea to me. I'm also interested in knowing why it blew up.

Totally. I wanna know too. My college friend was majoring in geneology. She was (and is) an incredible resource.

[applepansy]

I'm dying of curiosity. I don't understand why something like this would blow up unless the university backed out????

[mormonmusic]

Originally Posted by Vort

How would I proceed? I suppose I'd go roughly as follows:

1. Ask the bishop to call the youth family history consultants - perhaps giving him a list of people I think would be qualified. Then get a list from him of those who have been called.
2. Talk with the youth and their parents about what you want to do (take them to the college campus and train them on the new program). Find a best time to go.
3. As a part of the previous step, explain what the youths' responsibilities will be before and after the training, so that you don't end up with a bunch of youth trained on the new program who have no idea what they are supposed to do with the knowledge.
4. Set up that time with the computer lab.
5. If/When everything is worked out, do the lab session and teach the program.
6. Report back to the bishop how everything went.

Thanks for posting an approach here Vort.

Your approach is what I thought was best originally, but I later felt the youth leaders had stewardship over youth activities, and that I should include them in the planning and execution. Also, they had mechanisms in place to make announcements, distribute calendars, and arrange rides. I also didn't want to compete with their activity night -- since that was the night I figured most youth and parents would be available.

Regarding calling the youth Family History Consultants, I spoke to the YW president for ideas since I didn't know the youth well enough to make a judgment. She replied "I'm still praying about it, and haven't decided who I want to do it". I explained that technically, it was my role to recommend candidates, and that I was only consulting her for information since she knew the youth. Family History Consultants ultimately report to the HGPL, consistent with the Melchizedek Priesthood Handbook. Also, that the Bishop was the ultimate decision-maker.

She did give me two names, which I forwarded to the Bishop.

He never called them, or any other youth to the position of family history consultant.

The activity is more complicated== separate post below.

[mormonmusic]

The Activity: What Happened

Here's what happened:

Opposition from the Young Men's President and the Family History Consultant

I actually tried to work with the YM and YW leaders to make the event happen, as well as the one Family History Consultant that reported to me. We had about 20 YW and only 2 YM. Scheduling would require that it happen at a time when the most youth were available, probably the activity night.

The YW President liked the idea of the training, and told me to work with a counselor in planning it. I spoke to the newly called Young Men's President and he balked. He thought the whole thing needed to be approved at BYC, even though I knew this meeting had never been happening, and as a three-time YM President, rarely saw a Bishop have time for it. I shared with him that perhaps we shouldn't let BYC be an issue since the meetings werent' happening yet. He disagreed, so I moved on without him.

The Family History Consultant also disagreed with it, claiming a whole variety of technical issues that I learned were really non-issues after doing some research.

A New Family History Consultant and a Date for the Activity

I spoke to our High Counselor, and he was a floored that there was so much disagreement. He said to call a different Family History Consultant that would cooperate. I did so, and told the YW counselor that the new family history consultant and myself would work with her to schedule the activity. We came up with a date and things looked good -- involving only the Young Women, but good.

Sabotage

Finally, the YW President calls me and asks for a meeting. She brings her YW counselor who then came out with a ton of other reasons why the activity should not happen. Including calling the university with whom she had no relationship, to determine if some non-essential software was installed (ancestry.com). Also that they were afraid it would be a turn-off to the youth, because family history was such a dry topic. I wasn't able to allay their concerns by citing the vision of the Stake President. So, I said, OK, what help would you like from my on Family History. They said "None". They later held their own family history activity, with the family history consultant who originally objected to the activity in the first place. They held it at a local library.

The Reprimand

I was actually flabbergasted that everyone was so against this, and after the meeting, was even more flabbergasted this YW Counselor had contacted the university (my employer) behind my back for the apparent purpose of sabotaging the meeting. She had also called the wrong person, who probably was wondering how a group of Mormons ended up using her computer lab. I was concerned there would be fall-out when I got to work, as this lab person had once been angry with me that IT had installed software for one of my projects in her lab.

So, I called the YW counselor to figure out who she spoke to, as well as the nature of the conversation so I knew what I was dealing with. She hung up on me. I tried to call back, but she wouldn't answer, so I wrote a note apologizing if I offended her, stating that what mattered was that we had a good relationship, not the activity or conflict.

Later that evening, she wrote a nasty note about how self-important and pushy I was, and also that I didn't listen to the youth leaders on matters that affected them. She copied the YW leaders and YM President, the Bishop, and then complained to the Bishop personally with her YW President. It was three pages long and very hard not to take personally.

A couple days later, the Bishop's Counselor took me aside and reprimanded me for being so overbearing and pushy with the youth leaders, and that I needed to listen to them more.

My Reaction

I was completely floored, because like everyone else who posted above, apparently, I thought this was pretty straightforward. Also, I'd experienced no interpersonal problems in the Ward to date, that I was aware of. In fact we'd had two previously successful cross-auxiliary projects that my group had initiated, and people were responding generally positively to the leadership I was giving. Also, in my work, I was involved in leading project teams, and none of this behavior from others had ever surfaced; feedback had always been positive.

There was even more fall-out after this, but I'd be interested in hearing what everyone's reaction is to what I've written so far -- what did you think I did wrong? Or was their reaction justified?

[Vort]

Oh, my goodness. I'm pretty much speechless.

[mormonmusic]

Originally Posted by Vort

Oh, my goodness. I'm pretty much speechless.

Why Vort? Don't leave me hangin' here!!

[john doe]

I would have started out by bringing up the idea in PEC and Correlation meetings before setting anything up, talking in terms of possibles and maybes, and then taking it to BYC with the bishop's endorsement. If those meetings aren't happening, then that needs to be addressed first. You can't correlate across auxiliaries if the leadership of the ward is not behind the programs.

Quite frankly, I have never seen a YM or YW leader who felt the need to report or answer to an HPGL. They answer to the bishop, the HPGL is not in their line of authority.