Is there something wrong with me?

[FunkyTown]

Hey, Brio:

Dating is an awkward thing at first and what you're doing is brave. Most people, if they have dating issues, don't ask for advice. That puts you a step above most people in your range. Finding attraction, like riding a bike, requires practice and patience.

However, there are a few things you should know about women. There are always exceptions to the following rules, but remember that if you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten.

1) The shy thing? Yeah. It doesn't work. I know, I know. We're going to get a lot of women on here saying 'My husband was shy!'. Now, go ask your shy friends how well they do with women. I bet they aren't going to be saying 'My dating life is super! No complaints.' That's okay - Being outgoing is a trait that can be learned. You just need to change the frame of mind you're in. Go out. Talk to a stranger. Tell a joke to a random person on the street.

2) You know what's sexy? Growing as a person. If you're a computer playing dude, join a gym. If you're a basketball player, go try out for community theater. It'll help you become outgoing, break you out of the shell you've created.

3) Don't get in to the friend zone. Talking politely with people for 3 months, then shyly saying you like them will not attract women. Again, we're going to get a bunch of people on here saying their husband was just like this. Ask your friends or - Heck, ask their husband if they had a great dating life prior to that. If you and her haven't been flirting, she hasn't been thinking of you romantically. You will just weird her out if you have been the perfect picture of niceness for 3 months and then say 'By the way, think of me romantically now.'

There are a lot more things to know, but those are the basics: Go out of your comfort zone, grow as a person, flirt. Don't get discouraged. You are a genetic winner. You come from a long line of people who have passed their genetic code on to their descendants travelling back to the beginning of time. You literally can not lose. Good luck.

[RachelleDrew]

Funky is 100% right.

You've got to make a direct effort regarding flirting. If I were to have polite conversation with a guy about the weather every day for six months and he all of a sudden asked me out? I would not only be confused, but also somewhat creeped out.

Getting out of your comfort zone will help you meet people, discover things about yourself, and attract girls. Funky is correct, personal growth is....for a lack of better words....sexy I always appreciate it when I see somebody trying something new. It makes me think they are open-minded relaxed.

Flirting takes practice. A lot of it. Don't get discouraged if you use the advice you are given and it isn't working at first. It takes a while to get the hang of flirting. Just keep putting yourself out there.

[pam]

Oh and don't ever use the line.."I lost my number can I have yours?"

[yenni]

Originally Posted by BrioCyrain

Hello, I want some LDS opinion on this. So I am like...20 and if I remember correctly the prefered minimal LDS dating age was what...16? Though in-between these 4 years I have yet to land a single date with a girl, LDS or non-LDS either way.

I know many people told me "the time will come" but I don't want to like some old gramps person by the time that happens. I mean all the LDS friends I have had since then had either gotten married or have been on numerous dates. I just want to know why I've been avoided or just been "collecting dust" these 4 years.

I've tried to make contact with LDS girls that I liked and when I told them that I liked them even though we spent time around the same friends and stuff they just blew me off and thought I was a weirdo. I don't see what so weird about me, I mean I am a bit shy but I don't see how that makes me weird.

Some people just think I just been running into fickle girls but I am a bit surprised since all the girls I've tried to get them to notice me seem to go under this "fickle" category.

I just wish I could have hope for the better.

I'm 26 and I've had 1 date from my singles branch. Yeah.

[Hemidakota]

Nothing wrong with you, you need to ask and when rejected, correct the flaw and try again.

[Kawazu]

Originally Posted by Carl62

BrioCyrain, if you want women coming after you from all four directions, learn to play guitar or the drums and get into a band!! Seriously! One characteristic that women love about guys in bands is not only the music, but the confidence that they seem to exuberate when they're on stage. Take it from somebody who's played in bands for almost 30 years in that it has NEVER hurt me when it came to women. You'll also gain confidence in yourself in accomplishing something by learning a musical instrument which will convey in the success of your personal life off the stage as well. Seriously, I've seen the most scrawny, ugliest, unkempt guys attract some of the hottest looking women merely because they played in bands. A good friend of mine who was good friends with Gene Simmons of Kiss said that when he was in college with him when he was just non-musician, future school teacher Gene Klein, he couldn't get a date to save his life!! Give it some serious thought. It honestly does work. If you do, I'll bet you'll be posting next year at this time when you're in your band about the problems you're having with juggling all the women who won't leave you alone. Good luck.

Did you happen to see the College Humor video about playing the guitar in order to attract women? The skit thoroughly outlines the scenario which you have described. (Off topic.)

[FairChild]

Maybe there is just simply something wrong with everyone of us? Could be.

[Thethuthinnang]

My hubby was 35 when he finally met and married me. Sometimes, cliche as it sounds, it just takes time till you find the right one.

[Dravin]

I'm 25 and haven't gone on a single date, not sure if that'll make you feel better or just make you compare yourself to me (a horrifying prospect for nearly anyone), but there you go.

[ploomf]

Ever Dravin? I'm 23 and I've never gone on a second date (and pitifully few first dates). I figure someday I'll meet someone crazy enough to marry me, I'm not too worried about it.