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VIEW PERSONAL BELIEFS
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POSTED BY:
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DDriskill
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DATE:
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05.02.2012 |
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SUBJECT:
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I took it for granted |
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LOCATION:
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Spanish Fork, Utah, United States
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I was born into the church. I've resided in Utah Valley my entire life, continually surrounded with church members and the always uplifting attitude they emanate. I was baptized, received the priesthood, and ordained up to a priest, just like everyone else my age. I saw with my own eyes and sensed with my spirit the powerful examples the young men around me set when doing their duty and the impenetrable determination that our senior priesthood leaders bore.
I was never one of them. I never believed I wanted to be. Not until it came down to me either losing that gift, or retaining it.
During a critical and difficult moment in my life, I was asked to speak in church on the powers of the Aaronic Priesthood, or something of the sort. I chose "something of the sort," making, I believe, the wise decision of talking about what felt right to speak on in church, about how much I missed, loved, and truly respected the priesthood, rather than concentrating so much on its power and authority (which is still important). I simply wanted to make it all a whole lot more personal. Before the talk, I hadn't realized the spiritual lengths that choosing this direction would take me.
The talk began harshly, maybe even awkwardly. I was as unsure of myself as I was about my testimony. I did not believe I was prepared. I began reading off a piece of paper I had typed up to help me not mess things up. The talk was good, others told me, but it was also probably a little choppy, I think.
Suddenly, when it was time to bear my testimony, I gave my realtalk. The spirit filled me at the very moment I chose to trust in him, in myself, and the words came out better than I had ever believed possible, better than I had ever seen myself doing before, better than when I read them off of a piece of paper. I allowed myself to be guided and I was taken beyond what I had ever anticipated. My heart was now in my words, and how beautiful they felt! I knew the spirit was with me, and that feeling made me comfortable up there on the stand in front of all those eyes. I told the congregation exactly what I felt was true, and was firm in what I knew. I spoke directly to the young men, others nearly my age, as a true leader and friend, sharing my honest and hard gained knowledge about the priesthood with them instead of choosing to feel inadequate and separate from the rest of the boys.
After my experience, I knew I had gained a better testimony of the gospel and had convinced myself (just as much as I had hoped to convince others) of how much the priesthood truly matters to me, and how able I really am in doing the Lord's work. An under-confident, typically quiet kid, was able to achieve what he had prayed for during the panic of his talk preparation, only after he realized that most of the answer came directly from within himself.
After understanding this, I was so filled with desire to pursue that which I had neglected during most of my teenage years: my priesthood duties. That day, I gained a truer testimony of the gospel and the priesthood, as well as an experience I will never forget in front of people I felt like I could never touch because of my "inabilities."
My thanks go to God for leading the way, just when I needed him most. He did it all.
I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
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