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VIEW PERSONAL BELIEFS
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POSTED BY:
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penny72
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DATE:
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27.08.2012 |
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SUBJECT:
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Being a member convert |
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LOCATION:
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Grimsby,
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I was baptised on my eighth birthday after being raised a child of record. I had, to say the least, a confusing childhood but my happiest memories are ones associated with church activity. My mother dies suddenly when I was eleven years old which created a major upheaval in my life. I still attended mutual and church but I started living a more wordly lifestyle, a sure sign of acting out my anger I think. I carried on like this until I was sixteen when I began a period of genuine obedience toward a gospel lifestyle. It was during this time I gained a sure whitness that the Book of Mormon was true which meant everything else was true but I still felt I needed to be perfect and good enough to be there and deep down I knew I wasnt. So I eventually went inactive and apart from short periods of trying to live a gospel life combined with trying to be perfect and 'fit in' as well as, a shocking realisation at the time' that LDS members are not perfect and sometimes not very nice or kind, I mostly stayed inactive. Until, one day when I was about thirty two years old and had a image of the Saviour in my mind and I had a few things to say to him. So I ranted and raged about the unfairness of my life and how I couldnt possibly live my life the way He wanted me to and it was totally unfair of Him to ask this of me. As my rant subsided, I realised the Savior had been looking into my soul the whole time but had not utterd one single word. I began to feel rather uncomfortable and then an image of gethsemene became imprinted on my find to the extent I almost felt like I was there! I then experienced the most incredible love and concern flood into my soul and I really realised just who I had been ranted at and what He has actually done for me. Then I understood, not in a intellectual way but in an emotional and spirtual way that Jesus Christ was actually real and what He had done was real and that no matter what He would be with me. I have now been fully active for seven years and have attended the temple to receive my endowments and yes Jesus Christ has been with me every step of the way even through the hardest of times. So in conclusion I received my tesimony when I was sixteen but I became converted at thirty two years and the impact this experience and subsequently others have had on my life is testiment to that fact.
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