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VIEW PERSONAL BELIEFS
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POSTED BY:
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RachelleDrew
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DATE:
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07.10.2008 |
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SUBJECT:
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Finding the truth. |
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LOCATION:
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Midwestern nowhere, United States
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I was raised in a very tolerant and loving family of many walks of life. While my father's side was predominantly Lutheran and Methodist, my mother's side was a different story. I had an aunt and uncle who were Pagan, a grandmother who was Pentecostal, a grandfather who was Catholic, several Atheist cousins and a plethora of Baptists. This was a great experience for me, I learned to be loving and compromising of all beliefs. However, it caused much distress to me spiritually. I never knew what to believe in, I never knew what was true. Because of that confusion and distress, I lived the first half of my life claiming to be a militant Atheist. I never actually believed there was no God, I just didn't what what God to believe in so I gave up.
I always separate my life into three parts. There was the first part of my life, before I knew Christ. Then there was the second part of my life, coming to accept Christ. I was a very, very lost person at the age of 18. I was living a life that no young adult should ever come to know. I came to feel Christ's love on a night when I felt totally unlovable, a night where I very nearly killed myself.
Not long after that I began attending a charismatic church that took most of it's teachings from it's Pentecostal counterparts. I loved the energetic love the members had for God. But I felt very confused about the doctrine and it's practices. I was somewhat outcasted by the members because I wore my hair short and didn't speak in tongues. But I continued to study my scriptures and pray.
Then came the third chapter of my life. Coming to know the one true church.
When I turned 19 I was visited by missionaries from the LDS. Out of mere curiosity I began to have lessons with them, much to the disdain of my then boyfriend. I loved everything they were telling me, it wasn't confusing and they were totally transparent with their teachings. It wasn't long before I truly believed Joseph Smith to be a prophet of God. Not to mention, he was completely relatable to me, as he once had confusion regarding the truth as well. After a few months of meetings, the missionaries started asking if I were interested in a baptism meeting with the local ward's bishop. I was very interested. My boyfriend however, was not. He issued an ultimatum - me or the church. Being very codependent I regrettably chose him. I severed ties with the missionaries, and months later eventually that boyfriend as well.
I wound up moving for a job opportunity and met a great young man who had grown up in the Mormon church. We fell in love very quickly, and I must confess part of my attraction for him came from his desire to become an active member of the church again. He had fallen away for a time, and was very distressed by this. I could tell it killed him to not be in the church, and it only further reinforced my desire to join as well. However, we became pregnant. Scared that we would not be accepted by the church members because of our actions, we stayed away.
About 10 weeks into my pregnancy, missionaries came to us. Interestingly enough, one of the young men had taught me in my previous attempt to learn the gospel! We were both very surprised to see each other, but it didn't seem like a mere coincidence to me. I felt it was only further proof that God was guiding me towards the church. The missionaries understood our concerns, and promised us that no one would be anything but thrilled to have us at the meetings, regardless of our pregnancy.
They were right, we've loved every Sunday since then. My great fellow proposed to me soon afterwards, promising to take care of me and our child (plus any others that may come someday) for eternity. We will be married in a little more than a month. He's currently trying to earn his Melchizedek Priesthood, and i'm awaiting my baptism which is scheduled for shortly after our wedding. We love living in Christ, we love the church, we love our son and we love each other.
Our life isn't perfect, but it's certainly blessed and I know it's because we gave ourselves back to our heavenly father and the church. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God and I know this church is the one true church, I only have to take a look at my life to see the proof.
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