http://newsnet.byu.edu/story.cfm/68997

I can hardly even believe this! Let's back up, and I'll summarize in case you don't feel like reading that. The Church has decided to stop sending North American missionaries to Russia for missions, instead only native Russians will be called there. For those of you have don't know, my boyfriend a certain Elder Ryan is on his mission in Russia right now! He only just got there about three weeks ago.

This is very interesting to me, and probably him, especially because in his grandmother's patriarchal blessing it talked about her descendant serving a mission in Russia. Sometimes I'm amazed at the little things. He is called and his group was probably the last one to actually go to Russia -- a lot of the missionaries recently called to the Russian missions have been quickly transferred to other places, such as Texas. 

I am so glad he got to go, though. And of course all the other young men and women who went at the same time. What an experience! Of course, I'm still waiting for a Russian letter, but it will come eventually.

I have another blog now, in case anyone feels like reading it on occasion: http://parvalexi.blogspot.com

Tags: Missionary Russia

3 comments View Entry

Hey all, perhaps an update is in order? 

Elder Ricks, a most lovely missionary whose letters I just about swoon over, is doing quite well at the MTC. He is only there for a week and a half now, and then he will be off to Russia. He just sent his family a CD of himself and some other missionaries singing The Lord Is My Shepherd, and his dad sent it to me. Oh, it is a sweet song. Those missionaries are going to make a lot of people cry tears of joy during the next couple of years.

At home for me it is getting quite difficult. My mom suffers from a type of depression which makes her very hard to deal with and very frustrating and... while she says and claims and feels like she cannot do anything, it is very obvious that if we all abandon her she will do what must be done. Abandon, of course, is used loosely, for example I helped her pack for our trip to Utah but after about half-an-hour I told her I was finished. At first she whined but as I left she gave up and said "Thank you" and, I believe, did just fine without me. It is sad what this stupid mental disorder does. Unfortunately there is no one in particular for me to resent, so I really just have to accept that this sort of thing happens. I am so impressed by how my dad can handle it and for thirty years (their anniversary was yesterday).

I think I just wanted to get some of that out of my head... Otherwise, I am alright. I find myself reading more fiction than I should. Really, I should be reading the Bible and Book of Mormon and other scriptures and talks and give my testimony a pillow of faith. Instead, "One Hundred Years of Solitude" is taking up my time with a long list of other books I must read. After seventeen years of life one might think I could have reconciled my love of reading with my spirituality, but for me it is a battle.

Well, good luck everyone with your lives. I must go and pack for Utah myself. We have a big family reunion this weekend, the first in 16 years.

Tags: Life

2 comments View Entry

Sometimes I wonder why Ryan loves me so much. Then I stop and smile and think I should just accept it.

He is still at the MTC. He is so sweet; I am graduating in less than two weeks and he sent me a graduation gift! It is just a t-shirt, standard missionary t-shirt I think, with the Russian flag on it and "Great!" in Russian. He also sent a little picture of Jesus coming out of the tomb after three days to meet his wife. I suppose really no one knows if he was married (someone must know), but Ryan likes to think so, and he said he thinking that it was Jesus' wife who waited for three days to see him again. At the end of the note on the back of the picture he wrote this simple line "It's true." I wonder why it is so hard to believe, and then I realize it isn't hard to believe. It is like the primary song which says "Think about Jesus? Not hard at all." I guess what is hard is to admit that this is what I believe amidst so many skeptics. This is part of why I really want to get to BYU, it will be such a different atmosphere.

Also he sent me a long letter! His poor mom, though. She was telling me all about how she only gets a couple of paragraphs, if she is lucky, per letter. When I get two pages! I didn't tell her this willingly, she dragged it out of me. Yet, she has five other kids at home and a baby born yesterday (Samuel, I saw a picture and he is quite adorable). I don't feel too bad about my letters :) And Ryan always manages to include some statement about our future together, like "If it all works, which it will of course, then we will do this and that". He's sweet.

In other news, I just started the Revelation of John and although I'm only a few chapters in I do like it. I've noticed some strange things in the scriptures and the JST. What I wonder is (and if anyone knows, please enlighten me) why our Bible doesn't have the JST written into the text? I often read something and think, "What? That doesn't make sense/that can't be true" and then look down and notice a different translation. It seems like it would be more efficient if the change was in the text. 

I think I am most excited to finish the New Testament and Book of Mormon because (1) I can finally say I finished them (2) I can reread them with some foreknowledge (3) well, hello, they are only some of the greatest books.

Tags: Missionary Girlfriend

0 comments View Entry

This is something that really I need to talk with my parents about, but since they aren't here I thought I'd post a blog for all the wise people on LDS.net to read and maybe lend me some advice? Maybe?

Next month I get to register for classes for my first semester at BYU. Of course, I'm really excited. Finally I get to move forward rather than sit at this school where I only have the most shallow of friendships and learn hardly anything. I was excited for a while about going down the Asian Studies route, which would mean studying Chinese and Asian culture historically and contemporarily. After talking with my grandpa, however, who is a great well-known Chemist, I am having serious doubts.

So a part of me wants to find either a different major to double with or switch with, or at least a really strong minor. Although I'm not good at math, I think if I tried I could do well with it. Talking with him made me want to do Civil & Environmental Engineering or Chemical Engineering. The more I look at them, though daunting they may appear, they are practical and can be used to do a lot of good in society. I want to have an effect in the world, and I know that really I can do that with any major but I suppose growing up with a dad who is a huge success in the business world/oil industry and a grandpa who is a huge success in the Chemical world, maybe I have a different view of what success should be. It is hard to reconcile that.

Tags: College

1 comments View Entry

Proverbs 31 is like the quintessential young women's "We are all daughters of God" chapter to quote. It really is a great section! But I couldn't help but grin and smile upon reading the same words in Ryan's tiny cursive handwriting last Saturday. He quoted it, of course completely unaware of its status as very very popular among YW.

I went to his family's house on Saturday for his 3 year old brother's birthday and then again on Sunday for dinner. It was fun, but when I went home Sunday night I couldn't help but cry in the darkness of my room. I miss him, he is my best friend. It is a funny feeling because I am proud of what he is doing and wouldn't want him to do anything else with this time, but selfishly I wish he could be with me, too. He writes wonderful letters, with allusions to the past and hopes for the future, but most importantly he writes his testimony in bits and pieces.

It gives me the motivation to write back with the same love and friendship. Waiting just isn't hard when there is something very much worth waiting for, some sweet goal.

The other part of my heart and mind is quite busy finishing school (three weeeeeeks!) and getting a job. I'm definitely not waiting by the doorstep for twenty-three months to creep by.

Tags: Girlfriend Missionary

2 comments View Entry

My parents left for Peru on Saturday. They will be gone a little more than two weeks. I am very much used to being left alone. Okay, I'm not alone, my older brother is here. But he is 28 and we both sort of keep to ourselves. We have been getting along a bit better the past few days but sometimes it is tense and usually we just don't speak.

Every other time my parents have left over the past year I have had Ryan to talk with, at least on the phone. I hang out with his family now and then, which is very nice. But I do miss him. And whenever I write letters I leave things out, realizing this only after having sealed and send said letter. I am keeping a journal in which I write stories and thoughts I have, so he can read them when he gets back. He took a journal with him and told me he would do the same thing. I think it is pretty sweet and I just imagine what it must be like at the MTC. Apparently he gets the most letters, but that is no surprise considering his HUGE family (five siblings, one on the way, plus two parents, plus his grandma probably writes to him) and myself, of course. 

Basically, I sure do think about him a lot. I think about songs and how they relate to missionary work. Everything I read in the scriptures I quickly wonder if he has ever read that and thought whatever it is I'm thinking about. He probably has, or if he hasn't I'm sure he soon will! I realized before he left that it is likely that at some point during his mission he and I will have read the same thing on the same day. It is a sort of comforting thought, really.

He wrote to me and said he "sang 'Abide With Me' in Russia". He didn't say in Russian. So being the grammar geek that I am I stared at this for a moment thinking, "He isn't in Russia yet!" He is sort of funny that way; he leaves out words in sentences and just writes the wrong forms. I don't mind, for some reason I think it is just really cute. It reminds me of him. He is so smart but overlooks the little details. A lot of people are like that, really, but once a person moves from spell-check to a pen and paper things turn out differently. 

Tags: Missionary Girlfriend

0 comments View Entry

He has been gone just a day more than three weeks. I must admit I only miss him in this aching way when I am not doing anything. I am sure that once I got on my trips this summer and start BYU in the fall that it will feel easier. I don't mean to sound self-deprecating, but once I have real friends again this will be easier. Right now, high school? I don't have real friends. I did at the beginning. I lost them all, I don't know why really. I just did. And now I am so ready to start over; I am a pretty nice girl :P 

I think I will get a letter from Ryan tomorrow. Maybe Saturday. But ever since I received one on a Friday I always hope it is Friday (because that is one day sooner than Saturday!) Really it is seven days no matter what. At least. 

The National AP tests are next week. Is anyone else on lds.org taking those? I'm taking Government on monday morning. I am sort of sad because the first time I ever took AP tests (last year) I got to talk to Ryan about it, and he helped me to study and he helped me to not worry. I'm not worried really now, but I just sort of want to talk to him. I know it would be inappropriate. I know that really if he called me I would get mad at him because he is a missionary! Geez! 

Also... it was easier to forget some things with Ryan around. It was easier to feel happy, and now I feel more like I did before I met him, a little depression really grows without a best friend to talk to. I'm sorry this is getting sad. I really just need a change. I'm so glad school is almost finished!

Tags: Missionary Girlfriend

3 comments View Entry

I'm an avid reader, and the internet is a great distraction to me. Lately I've become addicted to a place called TheBoard. It used to be independent but is now owned by BYU, pretty much. It's an advice board. Well, I look up things that interest me on here and see what people have to say. In lieu of Ryan being at the MTC I looked up missionary + girlfriend + waiting. Most of the posts don't like the idea. So what, right? A lot of people are down on it. Missionaries are supposed to be dedicated! But some of the responses make me feel conflicted. 

This for instance quotes at length an article from long ago about not dating exclusively and not dating young men before they go on their mission, especially. 

I can understand, it makes sense. But they act as if there is not alternative. And what is funny to me is that a lot of general authorities and apostles and some of the Prophets married their girl-who-waited.

Also, I talked to my Bishop about two weeks ago, right after Ryan left. He has known Ryan and myself for a long time, and knew we were dating. He told me that our letter writing will be a great spiritual experience and that I can be a wonderful support for him. My parents agree. My grandparents agree. It's funny, and I don't really think I'll regret saying this later, it isn't for everyone; but it is for us.

Tags: Missionary Girlfriend

0 comments View Entry

Yesterday I got a second letter from Ryan. Don't worry, I'm not just relating what the letter says, because I am positive that for anyone except me that would incredibly boring. I was really excited to hear that he is doing well (and that the cooking at the MTC isn't as good as mine!)

I realized while I was writing a letter this morning that it has not taken very long to realize what sorts of things are really important and which things I really want to talk about with him. Earlier this week I wrote two letters to him, because I kept thinking of things I wanted to say. But now it is easier to discern what I want to say because I just want to talk to someone or what I want to say because it is something I think he should know about. 

It is funny but I keep doing things or saying things that remind me of Ryan. I am pretty sure that I should be sad, but I'm not. I cried a lot a few days ago and that should last me for a while. The past week and a half has gone by much quicker than I thought it would. Maybe it is true that two years goes by quickly?  Any thoughts? My parents say that when my brothers were gone it went quickly. I didn't feel the same way; then again I was going through tough times for a young preteen/adolescent girl. I wonder how this phenomena works, also. Are we receiving a blessing of smooth rolling time more often when supporting a young man serving the Lord? 

So much to think about! Maybe that is why it is two years - so we can concentrate on learning something while the missionary is away. He was quite a distraction, that is for sure.

Tags: Missionary Girlfriend

2 comments View Entry