She sat in the rocking chair by the window coldly remembering the argument last night. Her husband, Mitchell, had come home from the dinner party exhausted and his first thought was for bed; only she had left half a dozen dresses strewn across the bedspread. His whine had turned to a nag, his nag into a command, his command into an argument and soon the clothes on the bed were forgotten and they only knew each other's anger. She'd cried herself to sleep, ruining the black chimois halter dress left casually over the pillow.

  This morning she'd woken up unsure of where she was. It took a moment for the daze to lift as she remembered: Mitchell had left slamming the door at 2am, his wheels spinning out as he raced down the street below. One of her neighbors had knocked shortly after, but she had ignored it in favor of her tears. And so she had gotten up and prepared herself for the day, cleaning up the disarray of furniture and clothes angrily thrust across the living room. And as she stepped outside to check the mail, she noticed an envelope taped to her door.

  Which brought her here, sitting by the window pondering the contents of this plain white envelope. It had been almost an hour and she still hadn't resolved to open it. Was it from Mitchell? Some sort of half-hearted apology? Perhaps he wanted a divorce? The thought struck terror into her heart in spite of the previous night's battle. For all the angry words she still loved him, somewhere deep inside. But the more she thought about it, the less sure she was that he still loved her. This thought burned in her mind as the tears welled up in her eyes. She had to open it.

My Dearest Janet,

  I have never been good with words, I'm afraid expressing my true feelings has always required more effort than I could muster. But I couldn't help but know of the fight you had with your husband last night. I determined I must tell you the thoughts of my heart.

  Do you remember when you first moved into your apartment 3 years ago? Your second day here I was looking down from my window and saw you step out of your car. You were only turning around to get the groceries from the back seat, but the way the sunlight caught your hair as you turned your head - I thought for sure I'd seen an angel. From that very moment I knew I could never love anyone else, that I must be completely devoted to you for all time.

  I apologize if this letter comes as a shock. It was most difficult to write, especially recognizing the current state of your marriage. But it was, after all, the state of your marriage that convinced me that I must write to you. I do sincerely wish you the best and all happiness and hope that perhaps someday I might make myself known to you.

Your Secret Admirer

 

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